Filling a void

Today, I think I just have to get the Tiger Woods thing off my chest.

Man, he killed me. I know he's a celebrity I don't know personally, never met, and will probably never meet. But he was the athlete I chose to follow back in 1996. When he was winning his 2nd US Amateur title. I have the golf magazines, articles and photos to prove it. I even have the 2 page "Hello World" Nike ad from the Wall Street Journal from the day he announced he was turning pro. I took heat for saying he'd win the 1997 Masters.

I bought the "Frank the Tiger headcover" before it was mass produced. From 1997 through 1999 I probably had 75% of the Nike golf shirts he wore. In my size of course. I bought 2 pairs of his first signature shoes. I had the hats. I started hitting Nike golf balls. As fate would have it, we even hit the same 3 wood when he joined the tour.

Obviously, I was all in for Tiger Woods.

I had many detractors who thought I was nuts for following a flash in the pan. By 2000, I was getting emails and phone calls apologizing for that!

As of last year, I have 2-3 bins of Tiger Woods memorabilia and stuff like bobble heads, golf balls, and posters. I was waiting for the day when I had the opportunity to create my man cave with Tiger Woods stuff. Today, the 2 page WSJ ad is hanging on my boys' wall in their bedroom.

But not much longer.

It has to come down. As a father, I can't tell my boys to be like Tiger anymore. He was never the perfect role model, but you could talk around the club throwing and cursing. But even this past season I started considering taking it down as his propensity for tossing clubs and cursing audibly become much more frequent.

But how do you tell a kid to be like Tiger now? Not my boys. I want my boys to love their family, their mother, their wives (someday) and children. I want them to be honest and trustworthy. I want them to have integrity.

Tiger the golfer will always be intriguing to me, but he has fallen from favor in grace in my eyes. I will probably still cheer as he chases the career majors record of Jack Nicklaus. I love seeing history being made.

Some may say I'm being hard and judgmental. Others will say he's human just like everyone else. Others will say, he's a man and has needs. Say on, ya'll. I defended him too when the news of the FIRST mistress broke. But 10 women later, and the details of the affairs was enough to push me away.

He's a fraud. He was nothing more than a dude who plays golf better than anyone else. But more importantly he was nothing more than a marketing image. He's the best at his craft, and his endorsements painted him as a good man too. We were lied to.

I'm one of the most loyal people you'll ever meet. And I'm a very forgiving person too. And no he doesn't owe me, you, or anyone but his family an apology. But for me to be a Tiger fan again, he's going to need to change his ways. A public apology will be a start, but actions speak louder than words. Show me you're a changed man, Tiger.

Deep down though, I feel for him. Like child actors and singers, Tiger never enjoyed a normal childhood. At the age of 2, he was already on TV! Of course, even at that age he wanted to be the best golfer of all time. But all the practice and preparation limited his time to be a kid. My guess is his whole life was and is golf. By his teens, he was going to be the next great thing, his life already on television and in the media. By 20, he had over $60 million in the bank, the world at his feet, and lots of power.

Who was gonna tell him no?

Only one person probably told him no. His father. It was easy to see that his father was his life. When he lost his dad, maybe Tiger lost his moral compass. Within no one left to steer him, and no one there for him to disappoint, Tiger went elsewhere to fill the void.

And now I'm looking for a new sports hero for the boys, and filling a void on a wall in my boys room.

In the meantime, I'll be praying for you Tiger.

So Who Is A Role Model?

"I am not a role model..." Charles Barkley 1993 Nike Commercial

So this Tiger thing has created alot of responses to my last blog. Of course it got me thinking some more, so here goes.

First thing I thought of was the Barkley commercial from the early 90's. Fact of the matter is, he's right. He's not a role model. He went on to say "Well, I don't think athletes should be role models. I think we are very lucky and blessed, but I think, the only thing we do is we have a God-given ability, just because I can run and dunk a basketball that shouldn't make me a role model."

For the record, Tiger was never a role model for me. I'm older than he is, and I have always had great role models in my life. Even when I was younger and Tiger was bursting on the scene, he was just the next great thing. I started following him.

I think Jared and Dave said it best. Admiration. I had alot of admiration for what he has done, and for how he carried himself. What I liked about the early to mid-90's was that I saw my generation saying "We don't have to wait to be great." I was a huge fan of the Fab Five at Michigan. We graduated from high school in 1991, and so I related to them that way.

Up until then, and there were always exceptions, youth had to wait to make an impact in sports. Occasionally, guys like Isiah and Magic would come around and be great right away. But they were the exception more than the rule.

I admired the Tigers and the Fab 5 because they knew they had the ability to be great at what they did and went and did it. I guess I lived vicariously through them because I, like any other kid, would always hear people tell us we had to wait. Our time would come.....

So Tiger came along, started whupping up on the old timers, winning majors before he was "supposed to" and things like that. And he handled it in a professional, classy way. I admired that and became a big fan.

But things change and my view on Tiger has to change now. I will always admire his golf ability and talent. But we are who we are. Tiger the golfer is Tiger the cheater. He's not 2 different people, but he lived 2 different lives. He had his public, competitive, marketing driven life, and he had his private life. His private life IS his private life, but we were led to believe it was a private, family focused life.

So my search for a role model is not for me. It's for my boys. I'm closer to age 40 than 30 these days and thus gave up on athletes and celebrities as role models long before Tiger even came along. I recognized they live in a different world. My role models are many, and basically they are examples for how I would like to be. They are men like my dad, my father in law, my uncles and Liza's uncles. They are great men who put God and family first. A bad word could not be spoken of any of them. That's how I'd like to think people look at me.

So I know how to be a good example to my boys. I believe I am and will be a good role model to them. But I also know that young boys watch television. Kids are the ones who want to buy jerseys in order to be like so and so. They are the ones who are in the backyard playing ball saying "I'm A-Rod". They're the ones in the driveway putting on their Lebron jerseys and working on copying his moves.

My boys are still young enough for me to be their hero. But in a few years I just become Dad and professional athletes become the heroes. I'm convinced that's the natural course of things in today's world. It doesn't mean I've changed. But Dad isn't on television. Dad doesn't dunk a basketball. (Especially this one.) Dad doesn't have his own line of shoes. At some point I will just be Dad, the guy who is unappreciated for putting a roof over their heads, food on the table, and clothes on their back. I was that way until I really grew up and learned to appreciate what my dad did for me.

That's why I say I'm looking for a role model now for my boys. They will latch onto the things and people I like right now. I can influence them their entire lives, but they are very receptive and moldable now. I want to show them that the athletes to cheer for are the ones like Alan Trammell, Joe Dumars and Steve Yzerman. Guys that I wanted to be like as a kid. Guys that do good in their arenas AND are good, moral people off the field. There aren't many these days.

So....I'm going to be looking for someone to trumpet to my boys. I plan on being THEE role model for my boys. But when the day comes to buy my boys their first replica jersey, I know it won't be one of mine. The million dollar question is: Who do I want it to be?

Way Too Long

Here I am again, after promising to do better at keeping this updated. Each time I promise, I go longer in between posts. I have good excuses, but this is therapy for me too.

So last time I blogged, Jakin was 11 months old. Today, he's a rambunctious, energetic, walking, running, talking blur of fun. He absolutely loves life and his family.

Last time I blogged, Liza was about 7 months pregnant. Today, we have a 7 month old bundle of joy little boy named Grant. He too is healthy and ready to take on the world. He's constantly baby talking and just started crawling. He loves watching Jakin and the dog, and the highlight(s) of his day is getting a bottle every three hours.

Both of my boys have the greatest smiles in their own special way. They light up their faces and in turn light up the room. I love getting home from work because 99% of the time Jake comes running to the door and Grant starts looking for me. Then it's smiles all around.

So all in all, my life is good. Never better. God's been good to the Hoods, even amidst the drama in my career right now. I've been working for GM for almost 10 years, and the last 12 months have been crazy. 3 rounds of major layoffs, salary reduction, CEO resigning, bankruptcy....not pretty. Then I took a position within GM on the Saab transition team. Long story short, I would go to a new Saab company when GM sold the brand.

If you've seen the news, the original deal fell through and now we're in for a period of waiting for what's next.

It's scary, but only if I think about it. I'm great at home, and great at work for the most part. But if I dwell on it too much I do start to worry. What's crazy though is I have an overwhelming level of peace. Since we heard that the deal fell through, I've had a week's worth of fantastic, peaceful sleep. I haven't that much good sleep in ages.

Bottom line, it's all in God's hands. Jesus is my portion. I'm under His shadow. He makes His face to shine on me. I am highly favored. These are the thing running through my spirit. God has been good. God is good, and He will always be good.

And deep down, I almost feel like it's time for a change. I was led back to writing, hence why I'm here today. I've always loved writing, going back to elementary school, high school, etc. It's like therapy for me, and I feel like I say things better when I write. I would love to find a way to make a career out of this. Anyone know how?

What's better?

So I’m trying to decide.

What’s better? Jakin as a little newborn baby, or Jakin as the energetic crawling 11 month old.

Obviously, the answer is they’re both the best. I may have said it before but being a father is the best. These last 10 ½ months have been some of the best of my life. As much as baby brings so many new things to a house, and they bring a new level of busyness, sleeplessness and messiness, it’s all worth it.

I almost feel like I’ve never had a bad day since he’s been born. Granted, I’ve had some rough days at work, but the second I get to my boy, it all goes away.

When he was a newborn, I loved holding him and having him fall asleep in my arms. If I was lucky, I’d nap right next to him on the couch. There was such a peace in those moments.

Now, it’s the joy and happiness I see in him. When Liza calls me during the day, I usually hear him chatting or laughing in the background. When I get home, all we have to do is make eye contact and he gets the biggest smile on his face. He crawls over and play time begins.

You can see now that he loves his mom and dad. If we leave the room for a second, he’s quickly behind us checking up on us. If he can’t see us, he starts crying sometimes. And like I said, he lights up the room when Liza or I walk into the room.

I love seeing how much he’s learning. He holds his own bottle. He’s crawling and loves pulling himself up. I think his favorite thing right now is holding onto mine or Liza’s hands to pull himself up. When we put him in his crib, he pulls himself up. And I think he’s trying to talk now. We tell him to say “MumMa”, and” buhbuhbuh” comes out. I can’t tell yet it if it’s baby talk or if he’s really trying to say the word.

He has an affinity for power cords and Kobe’s water bowl which means he’s learning what “No” means now. He’s been scolded enough to know what it means. If he heads that way and touches the bowl, all we have to do is say “No” and his bottom lip protrudes into the cutest little pouty lip. At that point, it’s hard not to pick him up and just hold him. It’s precious.

Last night we were watching him play in his little play area. You could see the wheels turning as he picked up each toy. Then he rolled over and looked at his book case. He just stared. It’s fun wondering what he’s thinking. He really is a thinker. When we go some place new, he takes his time taking it all in. No smiles or anything for the first 10 minutes or so. He’s got to take it in.

But once he’s cool, the fun begins. He makes friends fast with his smile and interaction. The big cheeks help too.

It’s a blast.

But I do miss when I could just hold him. I miss when he wouldn't cry to be let down or crawl away. He’s gotten so big.

Good news is, I’m only about 3 months away from getting to do that again!

Let's try this again

Okay...everytime I say I am going to do better at this. I do worse.

Back in late October,I even attempted to keep the blog alive by posting some songs with the lyrics. Which I guess some construe as not making an effort, but at the time I didn't have that much to say. In all honesty, that's what was on my heart. I had nothing to say...rumors of GM going under were flying around the office. I didn't know what my next assignment was going to be. Our group had a new boss.

All I could do was...think...and put it in God's hands. And things are good.

GM rumors are still all over the place. I have a new job assignment that's been a little trying at times. But God is good.


So since I last posted we've had many first in our home. Jakin's first Halloween. Our first African-American President. Jakin's first Thanksgiving. Jakin's first Christmas. Jakin's first tooth. In three months, so much has happened.

The Champ is crawling like a mad man now. He started around New Year's and has been go, go, go ever since. His latest development is pulling himself up along the couch or whatever he can get leverage on.

It was a very fun and cute development. What made it even better is how much he depended on us to do it. Once he was confident in crawling, he was quick to come find us when we would be in another room or on the computer. Then once he got to us he'd try to crawl up, so we'd pick him up.

Well that turned into him giving us his hands. We'd pull up a little, and he realized he could get his feet underneath him and stand up like a big boy. Now he needs little help from us and the other day he crawled into the kitchen while Liza was emptying the dishwasher. He pulled himself up and started pounding on the dishwasher like he was a little King Kong. He was so proud.

And he's still proud when he stands himself up. Tonight, I put him in his crib, said a prayer, gave him his pacifier, and went to fill up his humidifier. When I got back, he was standing in his crib, one arm over the rail, with the cutest "How do you like me now?" look.

I just started laughing. Then he started laughing...Then Liza came in and she started laughing. Then we all laughed more.It was truly a memorable moment in our home.

Things are good for us, and God is great. Liza is managing this pregnancy well, though she's usually pretty tired at the end of the day. All the signs for our new baby are good.

Liza has to go in for a progesterone shot every week until week 36, I believe. So she's got another 10 or so to go. She needs the shots because she went 6 weeks early with Jake. Research has shown the progesterone helps the baby stay in longer. I think she'll still go early, but not 6 weeks early.

As far as me, like I said, things are good. Work is steady, I'm getting my arms around the new assignment, and feel valuable. I'm continuing to get more involved at the church. Dad has me speaking once a month now. I'm trying to develop a tech ministry. It's not all that techy, but it is fairly organized now.

I spoke 2 weeks ago at church, and God impressed upon me talk about the urgency and necessity to mend broken friendships and relationships. I've always been bothered by watching good friends and even family members let their relationships fall apart. We need each other. One of the cool things about preparing for that message was how I started making contact with friend of mine from college, high school and even as far back as little league and elementary school. Ain't facebook great?

It was so cool to see and hear how my good friends are doing. Almost all of them are doing well. But the best part was seeing how true they remained to character and personality I remember in them. One of the smartest kids I even knew is pursuing is Ph.D and has travelled all over the world. Another friend was someone I knew as a 5 year old and our parent were great friends. Another friend with musical talents clearly from the Lord is leading worship and training musicians in other countries.

Again, God is good.

As far as "the front pew" goes. I'm feeling inspired again. For whatever reason, I just couldn't write anything for awhile. But over the last couple weeks, I sense the gift again. I pray it continues to well up and start to flow again.

Thanks to all who have checked on the blog while I've been slacking. And welcome to everyone else who I included in my update email

n8

Because of who you are

Here's another song that's truly blessed me this week.

Because of who You Are - by Martha Munizzi

Because of who You are, I give you glory
Because of who You are, I give you praise
Because of who You are, I will lift my voice and say
Lord I worship You, because of who you are
Lord I worship You, because of who you are(repeat)

Jehovah Jireh, my Provider
Jehovah Nissi, Lord you reign in victory
Jehovah Shalom, my Prince of Peace
And I worship You, because of who You are

Bless the Lord

Times are tough, folks. Really tough.

What do you do when it gets tough.

God's led me to spending more time with him and I'm spending much more time with praise and worship music.

I'm going to try and post the lyrics to songs that bless me every day. I pray you will be blessed as well.

He Knows My Name - by Tommy Walker

I have a Maker
He formed my heart
Before even time began
My life was in his hands

He knows my name
He knows my every thought
He sees each tear that falls and
He hears me when I call

I have a Father
He calls me His own
He'll never leave me
No matter where I go

He knows my name
He knows my every thought
He sees each tear that falls and
He hears me when I call

Well Hello!

Sorry. I’m back. Had to step away for a second.

Ok….so it was longer than a second. It’s been 6 months! 6 MONTHS!

A lot has happened since the last post. I remember sitting in the room posting to the blog. I remember being a nervous 1st time dad, with a preemie born 6 weeks early. I remember being scared. I remember being proud, Proud as a father, proud of my wife, and proud of my son.

Jakin showed so much fight that week. He was a stubborn boy and he’s stubborn somewhat today. As frustrating as that can be when we’re trying to feed him or soothe him, it’s a trait I’m glad he has. His stubbornness to learn to breathe is part of what has him with us today.

I apologize for not keeping the blog updated over that last 6 months. I had every intention to keep everyone up to speed on the Hoods and Jakin’s growth and development.

Life kinda got in the way. I’ve been busier than ever at work since about 2 weeks prior to Jakin’s birth. It hasn’t really slowed down. And when I get home, I just want to hang out with my boy.

Sure, I spent time on the computer keeping up on current events and my fantasy sports. I posted a fair amount of pictures out there too. But I didn’t keep up with something I love and that’s writing. I missed it, but didn’t want to miss time with my growing family. Liza, Jakin, Kobe and I have had the time of our lives since March 10. The day he joined our family, our whole life changed for the better.

It’s been awesome.

I’ll share the Reader’s Digest version now.

Jakin was born March 10th and had to stay in the special care nursery for 8 days after he was born. Those 8 days were really long in my opinion. Liza spent the entire time at the hospital. I think I stayed 2 nights and drove in the other days. I’d spend all day at the hospital. We’d try to feed him every 3 hours. He was so little and it took time for him to learn the sucking reflex. We’d hope to get an ounce or 2 in him every feeding. They had to add Human Milk fortifier for calories to help him put on weight. I joked that he was on HGH or steroids.

He fought jaundice and spent a lot of time under the blue lights and in a warmer. He didn’t have enough fat to keep warm. We were so happy when he was able to lose the breathing tubes and IV. He showed progress every day, and we know we had a fighter.

I was concerned about Eliza for awhile. Her mothering instinct is strong and she wasn’t getting much sleep at the hospital. The nurses and I had to convince her several times that they were there to help her. They could feed him during the night so she could sleep and recover. We kept telling her that when she went home, she wouldn’t have that help available. She got used to the idea and started sleeping through the night. But she made sure she was there bright and early every morning to feed him.

A big day for us was getting her out for a couple hours. I took her out to eat, did some shopping, and over to my parents to see Kobe. She and Kobe are so close. She cried when she saw him and cuddled him. I think he was just as happy.

Finally, after 8 days we got to bring the little man home. He was so tiny in his car seat.

We brought him into the condo and gave Kobe a few minutes to check him out. Jakin was sleeping, and I have no idea what Kobe was thinking. But he handled it well. Almost as if he approved and thanked us for the new toy.

The first few weeks were tough, as expected. It was easier for me, as I’m not equipped for nursing. Liza tried nursing for awhile. For whatever reason Jakin didn’t take to it, so I was back on the feeding duty cycle. There were times he cried and screamed and we had no idea what to do. Liza and I both had frustrating moments where we weren’t sure if we were cut out for this.

I remember one day where I got sick really quickly and suddenly at work. It came out of the blue and it was violent. I came home that day and Liza , after a long day with the baby, was ready to hand Jakin off to me. Tears filled her eyes when I said no and suggested her and Jakin head to her parents overnight. It worked out. Liza’s mom helped out with the baby and Liza was able to rest.

After the first 3-4 weeks, we’ve had the time of our lives. Liza sends pictures to me throughout the day as Jakin learns new things. She’d send pictures of his first smiles, of tummy time, of nap time, of puppy time, of just about everything new. Of course I wanted to run right home when I would get the pictures.

One of my favorite times so far was one morning when he was about 3 months old. He’d been sleeping through most of the night by this time. It was a Saturday and the sun was starting to shine through the blinds into his room and crib.

I walked into peek on him and he was waking up. When he saw me he gave me this cute little happy smile. Almost like, “Hey Dad!” Now I’d seen a few smiles from him already, but this one was special. There was no prodding. No silly talk or faces. Just a pure, innocent, happy baby smile. I reached into his crib, touched his hand and he grabbed my finger. I ran and got the camera and started taking pictures of our interaction that day. I’ll always remember it.

Around the same time he started his cooing. Then he started trying to roll over. Then he was kicking. Soon he was trying to talk. The big thing (literally) was him trying to keep his head steady. Jake’s got quite the noggin.

I rolled about 6 months of development into 6 paragraphs to get to where we are today. Jakin’s caught up in length for his age. He’s right there on weight too. He’s doing just about all the things a 6 month old baby should be doing.

He has a big blue eyes, and a great big belly laugh (which is appropriate for his great big belly!), and we know all his ticklish spots. He’s a happy baby for the most part and he’s has an infectious smile and laugh. He gets lots of attention when we go out, and he’s already a bit of a flirt.

He loves being picked up to “fly” around the condo. The other day I even had the Superman theme song playing as I flew him around the house. He was so happy. I think he thought he was really flying.

He’s responding to his name. He goes by Jake, Jakin, Jake Jake, and Jakers. I call him Champ and Li’l Man.

Jake loves being outside and he absolutely loves Kobe. Kobe seems to love him too, but does get jealous of all the attention Jakin gets these days.

The best thing right now is you can see that Jake absolutely loves Eliza and I. He saves his biggest smiles and laughs for Mom and Dad. You can see it in his eyes that he knows who were are and that we are his favorite things in the world. He is such a happy baby most of the time. And when he’s not, we put a bottle in his mouth and 10 minutes later he’s happy again.

This by far has been the greatest adventure of my life. Being a father surpasses anything I’ve ever know or any feeling I’ve ever had. Before he was born, I said all the right things about it not mattering if we had a boy or girl. I wasn’t being honest.

Jakin is the son of my dreams. I always had a vision of being a dad and having a son first. I always pictured myself teaching him how to throw and play sports. I pictured the 2 of us sitting down watching a ball game together.

And it’s such a peaceful thing living that life.

An old childhood friend of mine contacted me this week. We hadn’t talked in over 15 years. But in our conversation we talked about the journeys we’d taken and how God has guided each of us to where we are now.

When I started writing this today, I planned on giving a quick update on Jakin, and then talk about how scary this world is. There’s a lot of things to be scared of. Unemployment, economy, war, diseases….

But I have a confession to make. I’m so happy where I am right now. I married the girl of my dreams. I have the son of my dreams. I have the worlds greatest dog too. I have a good job. I have a condo that will be too small for us soon, but it’s our condo and I love it. I have more friends than I can keep in touch with. I have a great family and great in laws. I know my God and my God knows me.

To quote the famous Yankee Lou Gehrig, “today I consider myself the luckiest man on the face of this earth.” But I’m not lucky, I’m blessed.

So with that I’m happy to announce another blessing. Liza and I have another baby on the way. She’s due April 3oth! We are blessed!

Speechless

There's no other way to put it.

I'm sitting in the hospital right now thinking back on the last week. If you would've told me last week I'd be here with Liza and our baby, I would have laughed at you.

Just last week, Liza made a marvelous roast for dinner. We had our friends over and played games too. Apparently, it was an appreciation dinner for the help I was giving Liza while her back was acting up.

It was a great night.

Last Friday, my friends at work threw a little shower for us. A little shower with big gifts. It was nice.

We had the final baby shower last Saturday. Again, family and friends showered us with love and gifts. Liza's parents and Julie came by and helped organize the gifts in the baby's room. Terry, Rhea and the kids stopped by to check out the room too.

And we made a short list of things we needed to get done over the next 6 weeks.

Sunday, Liza was tired, but still wanted to go to church. She had missed a couple weeks and really felt like she should go. It was a great service.

As we were leaving, Rick Collins told Eliza to stay away from sharp objects.

She turned around and said, " I know, I might just pop!"

We headed over to my parents after church for a birthday party for my sister in law Nicole. We ate lasagna, had some cake and ice cream and we were home by 7:30 or 8.

We just relaxed at home, discussed how busy my life was going to be that week. Based on the outside of work schedule, I told Liza I was going to have to work late Monday. Here's how my week looked as of 8 pm on Sunday, March 9.

Mon - work late

Tues - Liza dr. appt (3:45) and our birthing class (6:30)

Wed - Pistons game

Thurs - Pistons basketball clinic at OU

Fri - Gary Allen fam birthdays at AJ and Julies

Sat - Couples small group and bible study

Somewhere in there, we needed to get a few more things off the registry, pack her hospital bag, I needed to get the dogs nails clipped and get their heartworm medicene.

So we turned the lights out at 10:30 pm Sunday, March 9 "knowing" what the week ahead was going to bring at us.

12:30 am Monday March 10 2008

"Nate"

"Nate"

I look around....Kobe's looking at me like "Dude, she's talking to you and I want to sleep."

I finally see Liza leaning out of our bathroom.

"I think my water broke."

Still groggy, I said, "What?"

Then I see it looks like she wet her pants.

So I said, "Are you sure?"

She said she just couldn't control what was happening.

I panicked for a second, but realized panic paralyzes, and gives me a migraine. So I took a deep breath, and rolled out of bed.

We discussed whether or not , but the more we talked about it, the more we figured it was.

So, since we hadn't packed her bag, I pulled out the book from our birthing class to see what we should pack.

While packing, we kept discussing whether or not her water really broke. I went back to the only thing I somewhat remember about the water breaking.

C.O.A.T.

Color, Odor, Amount, Time

It seemed like that's what it was.

So, we got it all together, packed some extra towels, and got in the car at 12:45 am.

We laughed because it was so early.

I turned on the radio, and just to hear the song "Feels like Tonight" by Daughtry. The next song was "The First Time' by Lifehouse.

Now we're really laughing at the songs that were be played.

So I switch stations to 99.5 and the next song was "There goes my life" by Kenny Chesney. Those of you who know your country music know it's a song about a young man having his first baby.

We got to the hospital within 25 minutes.

The security guard wheeled Liza up to the Labor and Delivery, and they gave us a room. The nurse came in and checked the fluid to make sure it was the amniotic fluid.

"Oh, yeah." She said and we started making the phone calls.

It was a whirlwind from there. We took notes, but thoughts are blurry right now.

It went something like this:

Labor started around 6:30 am with contractions 4-6 minutes apart

10:30 - Dr. checked and she was dilated to 2 and the baby was 80% effaced.

11:30 - Liza gets her epidural.

12:05 - Baby's heart rate dropped and we alerted the nurse station. All is well.

1:00 - They start Petocin (Petossin?) to help the contractions.

1:40 - Dilated to 3+, 90% effaced stop Petocin.

3:30 - 100% effaced, dilated to 6

4:15 - More Petocin

6:00 - Liza started pushing

7:17 pm - It's a boy! Jakin Christopher joined our family.

I'm still breaking down the moments from the nurse's "Oh, yeah" to them whisking our little man away, to watching him breathe so rapidly trying to get his air, to watching his amaizing progress, to where I'm at right now...

Sitting in room 214, thinking about the strength and determination my little boy has already shown me and the world.

The name Jakin means "He establishes" and one of the pillars of Solomon's temple was named Jakin.

A pillar holds things up, and our little guy has held us up with his progress, development and strength.

That's my boy.

The issue at hand

Who do you like?

I like Huckabee. Some Republicans and conservatives don't.

Seems the media like McCain. I don't doubt he's a decent man, and should be commended for his war heroism. But he's not the best man for this job.

People these days want to talk tax record. What's so and so gonna do for my pocket book?

Others want to talk foreign policy.

Some want to talk "first black president."

Some want to talk "first woman president."

In my opinion the latter two are ego based, and not based on the good of the country. The principles are out of whack. But isn't that all politics are anymore? Ego. Leaders should lead, naturally. The egos are so bad nowadays, that its like elementary school politics. Talk bad about the other guy, side step my issues, and hope I win.

It's really not about country anymore. It's about being President.

We have an attorney who think she knows how to run the country because she watched her husband run the country.

Huh?

We have a young energetic, multi-ethnic candidate who would be the ideal image in today's diverse America. But what does he stand for?

They seem to be the favorites in today's anti George W world.

Ladies and Gentlemen, we've let todays world and media tell us what we should be voting on and who we should be voting for. CNN was even predicting winners in today's Super Tuesday before voting was half over.

So I have an important question for you.

It's not "What's the candidate's stance on taxes?"

It's not "What's the candidate's stance on gay marriage?"

It's not "Who has the best chance of winning?"

The question is "What was this country founded on 230 years ago?"

It was Godly principles.

The only guy left out there with the Godly principles is Mike Huckabee. He uses scripture in his speeches. He opposes abortion. He's in favor of teaching morals. He's against gay marriage. As Christians, doesn't he sound like the guy we should like.

But then they bring up his tax record.

It isn't the greatest, but from what I understand, they were short term, and the intent was to fix economic and financial problems in the state of Arkansas, where he was governor.

But do you want to know his plan for taxes? It's the "fair tax plan".

It eliminates the income tax and the IRS! It eliminates corporate tax and the Social Security tax. You would not be taxed on what you earn, but on what you spend. Essentially, it's a sales tax. And yes on everything. Supposedly, it's a 23% tax, some say it's closer to 30%.

But your income, no matter what level or amount, wouldn't be taxed. Your spending would be. Is that a bad tax plan?

Sounds fair to me.

I mean, think about our tax structure today. Depending on your income, most Americans are giving back 15-35% in federal tax. That's before state income tax, any city income taxes and social security.

That's alot of taxes. It's all gone before you spend one dime.

Now, to be fair, I'm sure nearly the same amount of taxes will make their way back to the government.

But Huckabee's plan basically, let's you choose your taxes. It's your money after all.

By the way, Huckabee is a licensed minister and pastored churches prior to being governor of Arkansas.

The important issues are the ones God says are important, not Fox news and CNN.

So while most of my audience lives in Michigan and our primary happened, pray about it tonight.

And ask yourself, if God were voting, who would he vote for.

2008 = No Worries

Looks like I’m back to my 2 month layoff between posts.

Sheesh!

So much has been going on.

Of course, the biggest thing in my life these days is the countdown to the birth of our baby. It’s been fun watching Liza go through her changes, and how great of a mother she already is. It’s fun feeling the baby move.

I can’t believe that we’re just over 2 months away!

We’ve got the furniture ordered, but not yet picked up. We have the ideas for painting, yet still have to paint. Things are so close, but at times seem so far away. We’re on the verge of being ready, but not really ready yet.

It’s fun watching Kobe protect his “mumma”. The other day we were at my parents and had Kobe with us. Kobe usually adores Tiger (my dog at my parents house), and annoys Tiger because Kobe always wants to be around him.

But Monday was different. Kobe was protecting Eliza from Tiger trying to get near her. Maybe it was jealousy, but that would surprise me. The 3 of them have cuddled many a time on one of the couches at my parents.

So my guess is Kobe knows Eliza is going through something, and is protecting Eliza.

Eliza is definitely “beaming” as a mother. It’s fun seeing someone become what they know they were born to do.

Surprisingly, I haven’t even fretted about changing a diaper yet. Can’t say I’m looking forward to it….but I’m not worrying about it.

As excited as I am about being a father, it still hasn’t sunk in. Me being who I am, I think more about the financial side of it right now. Things like:

Am I going to be able to provide enough?

What do we cut if the costs are higher than expected?

Can we survive without Eliza’s income?

We need a house?

But can I afford a house?

But then I have to think, “Life is good for the Hoods.” Praise God for it.

He’s always provided, and I know He always will. Even recently, I got good news in relation to our financial situation. Wooo Hooo!

See, I’m a “think through it” guy. I’m always thinking “what if…” and running scenario after scenario through my mind. But I know that all the planning I do, can often change with the direction God moves us. And then I start “what iffing” again.

Recently, another potential development made an appearance in decision world. The house and property that the Hood generation before me grew up on went on the market. And it's a steal. Ideally, I'd sell my condo today, purchase the home, and decide whether to renovate or build new.

What to do, what to do?

Here's what I've decided to do.

Not worry.

I was reminded of this great thought when I went with the Allen clan to see the Lion King at the Detroit Opera House. It was a great show, but I got something out of it too….

Hakuna Matata

No worries.

That’s how we should be. No worries. God’s got it all in control. He tells us countless times in His word not to worry. To know that He is in control, and He is God.

I knew that.

But it took a Simba, Pumbaa, and Timon to remind me of it.

So as I start the first blog of the new year a month late! Let me remind you…

Hakuna Matata.

Thankful in 2007

Apparently I need to update this…..Lindsey, Liza threw you under the bus.

I guess I don’t really have too much to say….In the spirit of Thanksgiving I guess I’ll go with the “Be thankful” thing. Original, I know.

Psalm 106:1, and many other Psalms say “Give thanks to the Lord. For He is good; His mercy endures forever.

This is another “original” thought but what are you thankful for these days.

Start a list. I dare you. You’ll come up with more things than you realize once you get started.

We had Thanksgiving day with Eliza’s family this year. Grandma asked me to say a little something before dinner, and one of the things I came up with was a list emailed to me a few years ago.

It’s a list of “The Best Things in Life” by Deacon Terry Downey.

Here’s the list. See if you agree.

* Falling in Love
* Laughing so hard your face hurts
* A hot shower
* A special glance
* Getting mail
* Hearing your favorite song on the radio
* Lying in bed listening to the rain outside
* Hot towels out of the dryer
* Finding the sweater you want is on sale for half price
* Chocolate milkshakes
* A long distance phone call
* A bubble bath
* Giggling
* a good conversation
* The beach
* Laughing at yourself
* Midnight phone calls that last for hours
* Running through sprinklers
* Laughing for absolutely no reason at all
* Having someone tell you that you're beautiful
* Laughing at an inside joke
* Friends
* Waking up and realizing you still have a few hours left to sleep
* Making new friends or spending time with old ones
* Having someone play with your hair
* Sweet dreams
* Hot Chocolate
* Swinging on swings
* Watching a good movie cuddled up on a couch with someone you love
* song lyrics printed inside your new CD so you can sing along with out feeling stupid
* Getting butterflies in your stomach every time you see that one person
* Making eye contact with a cute stranger
* Seeing smiles and hearing laughter from your friends
* Holding hands with someone you care about
* running into an old friend and realizing that some things (good or Bad) never change
* Discovering that love is unconditional and stronger than time
* Hugging the person you love
* Watching the expression on someone's face as they open a much desired present from you
* Watching the sunrise
* Getting out of bed every morning and thanking God for another beautiful day.

It’s a tough world right now.

What if you have a job these days? Be thankful, even if you hate it. Unemployment in Michigan is pushing 9-10%. We’re blessed to have jobs right now.

See that job, as much as we may hate it, allows us to pay the bills. It allows us to put food on the table. It allows us to put gas in the car. It allows us to go Christmas shopping.

The 9-5, or 8-5, or 7-4 or shoot, even the 12 hour day jobs are the things God gives us to sustain our life. In 2 Thessalonians 3:10, the Bible says “If a man doesn’t work, neither should he eat.”

This doesn’t mean if you get laid off, you shouldn’t eat. But it’s saying if you’re lazy…

We are blessed to have jobs these days. I work with and know plenty of people that don’t really like their jobs. But most of the people who feel that way, have never had to go paycheck to paycheck. They’ve never had to worry about getting a paycheck.

For those fortunate to have a steady job, they worry about getting raises or bonuses. They worry if the raise will be 2% instead of the 10-20% raise they feel they deserve.

I’m guilty of it. It’s easy to get caught up in the wanting more, and forgetting what we have.

I’m blessed enough to have some money left after paying the bills. Some of it is because of good decisions and not overextending, but most of it is because God blessed me with a good job.

Even when our little one is born, we’ll have some leeway. Not nearly as much, but we shouldn’t have to worry too much. If we ever get a house….tighter still, but should be okay.

And that’s based on what we have right now. Who’s to say that in the next 6 months, God doesn’t bless us? I could get a raise. We might find a good deal on a house. We might sell the condo for what we want to get for it.

I’m reminded of the song lyrics, “His eye is on the sparrow and I know he watches me.”

If God is taking care of the sparrows, and he loves us more, don’t you think he’ll take care of us?

Be thankful for what we have. Be diligent with what we have.

Start your “Thankful” list. Watch how quickly it grows.

Trick or Treat

Let’s get a little controversial…..just a little. I’m not a big fan of controversy.

Halloween. Yes or No? Good or bad?

I’ll start with how I was raised. My family didn’t really have a problem with it, as long as it was done in a pure or fun way.

Growing up, I dressed up as everything from David the Giant Killer (with a sling !), Luke Skywalker, baseball player, Superman, and Rocky Balboa. We would trick or treat down our street and occasionally we’d hop in the car and go to another neighborhood.

My parents actually think of it as a witnessing opportunity. They would and still do pass out witnessing tracks with the little bags of candy.

We carved pumpkins.

Did we celebrate Halloween as a holiday? Sort of, but more than anything we enjoyed a day that was geared towards kids and candy. Even in the 80’s it was sort of innocent.

I remember conversations my parents and their friends would have about Halloween. It’s a pagan holiday. How can you celebrate it?

Their response was basically there is nothing wrong with it, at least in the way we participated.

We weren’t devil worshipping. We weren’t participating in evil.

Their biggest worry at the time was people messing with the candy and if we got enough Almond Joys or Mounds bars.

Even as a kid, the monsters that seemed to be lurking on Halloween were ghosts and goblins, with an occasional smiling skeleton, witch or vampire mixed in. People laughed at them more than anything else. As a product of the 80’s, we started to see the Jasons, Freddy Kruegers, and Michael Myers starting to pop up. Back then, that was pushing the limits.

It’s amazing how things change in 20-25 years.

It still seems fairly innocent for kids, but I was just reading how even the young girls are wearing racy costumes these days.

I guess I’m talking more about the 18-40 year old group. People seem to embrace the evil these days. Or they push the limits for their costumes. Creativity is defined by how edgy you can go. This means perverted, evil, off-color costumes are becoming the norm.

Dressing up as a nurse isn’t the same as it was 20 years ago. Dressing up as a maid isn’t the same as it was years ago.

Or people go all out evil.

Now the evil that people dress up as comes straight from the pit of hell. And why not, that’s what people see in the horror movies these days. It’s not longer Frankenstein or Dracula.

Its demons, devils and mutants that want to kill and destroy.

Hmmmmm. I know someone else who looks to kill and destroy.

I never liked the fear factor of Halloween. I never went to haunted houses growing up. It wasn’t so much the being scared or not wanting to be scared. I have always thought of it as stupid.

It was probably because I knew 2 Timothy 1:7 “God has not given me the spirit of fear, but of power, love and a sound mind.”

It was probably because I knew Philippians 4:8 “Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.”

So my question is, if God doesn’t give us the spirit of fear, and doesn’t want us to think on such things, why do we?

Can I go beyond Halloween and into horror movies? Why would anyone, let alone a Christian want to watch these things? We let the Friday the 13th, Halloween and Nightmare on Elm Street and similar corny horror movies fly in the 80s. It was gore, but silly and over the top.

Horror movies today are pure evil. It’s almost like Satan himself created, directed and produced them. Yet for some reason, people flock to see them.

If God hates evil, why don’t we?

Let’s go another step, shall we? We’re living in a society that is trying it’s hardest to remove God from it’s culture. More and more, we are being told how we can’t celebrate God or his holidays. And we go along with it.

But Halloween is one of the fastest growing holidays. People don’t just carve pumpkins anymore. They go all out. It’s sad when there are more decorations for Halloween than there are for Christmas. But we go along with it.

And like I said before, they celebrate evil and rationalize racy, evil costumes as fun for a night.

Let’s see. If we go along with the removal of God from culture, and we go along with the celebration of something that is fast becoming entirely anti-God, how soon before God is out of everything we do?

But if Mom Allen reads this, thanks for making Halloween like I remember as a kid. The bowls of candy. The orange and black everywhere. The cider and donuts. The silly looking skeletons, spiders and witches. The tombstones with funny inscriptions.

That was fun. That was Halloween.

The Company We Keep

Thanks Hood. The trouble with having a creative friend like Nate is that they can somehow manage to compliment you and poke fun at you at the same time. I also end up getting dragged along (although willingly) in some of his creative ventures, like this blog. But I guess that's the price of friendship right?

I'm the kind of person that places a lot of importance on my friendships. Because of that, I often find myself thinking a lot about my friends. Not in a, "I wonder what they're doing right now" kind of way. But really, thinking about them. Who they are as people. The people, and experiences and circumstances that have helped to make them who they are. And ultimately, what impact do they have in my life? And what impact am I having in theirs?

I've been very blessed in my life not only to have a great family, but to have great friends. I really believe that in order to reach your full potential, it's important to surround yourself with people who will encourage you but still challenge you; support you yet correct you when needed. A scripture that Nate and I often like to quote is Proverbs 27:17 "As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another". That pretty much sums up our friendship. We've learned to be encouraging and challenging, supportive and correcting. And to have the occasional laugh at each other's expense. It's the people around us that will help to keep us "sharp".

Most people would probably say that they keep "good" company. That their friends are "good" people that they get along with and enjoy hanging out with. And that's fine. But the question that I always ask is, am I keeping "the right" company? Are the people around me people who are pushing me forward towards my goals or are they holding me back? I want to surround myself with friends who can be iron for me and I want to be able to be iron for them as well. My goal is to have a greater positive influence on the my world than it has on me. It's a pretty lofty goal, I know. Sometimes I feel like I'm making an impact, other times I don't. Either way, it's a start.

What about you? Are the people that you keep close to you having a positive impact on your life? Are you having an impact on the lives of your friends?

I guess what I'm really trying to say is that, if you want to stay sharp, find some iron. Because ultimately, who we are and what we are is all just a reflection of the company that we keep.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you

John Mack.

John Mack, New Haven-ite, Princetonian, THEE cornerstone of a Princeton track dynasty, Chicagoan, and all around good guy, has agreed to be a contributor to thefrontpew.

I don't have a picture of his mug yet. He's my brother from another mother, so we don't really look alike.

But we do share a mutual Godly perspective on things. He, like myself, is a pastor's kid. So he's a natural to give his view from the front pew.

Our fathers have been friends for probably 20 years, as pastors in the village of New Haven and probably knew of each other back in their New Haven High School days. The two of them have been very influential in the village and school as pastors. They are men we are both proud of.

And they are both men who have big dreams for us. Ironically, our dreams may be bigger than the ones they have for us.

John and I have discussed the chances of us following in our fathers footsteps. It could happen. But like John so eloquently put in a sermon of his, he may want to bulldoze his dad's building and build a bigger one.

That is after John has been commisioner of the Big Ten, mayor of Chicago, and my vice president.

We have discussed many topics over the last 8 years or so. Actually, how long is it, John? But together we think we can solve hunger, world peace, and probably 60% of the sports franchises.

We have talked about writing a book together for awhile. We haven't gotten far on that yet, but this blog could open up the door for such things. Personally, I'm looking forward to this.

John, the floor.....blog is yours whenever you like. Hopefully you and your fans will check in and many people will get to see the view from the front pew.

Together, maybe can move people from the back of the church into the seat next to us or the pew right behind us!

Our journey and mercy

We’re all on a journey.

My intent on my own journey is to share the things I learn in life, as well as my thoughts and feelings, through my writing. One of the avenues is this blog.

I really feel God telling me right now to dive in. Perhaps He’s always been saying it and I’m finally listening or hearing Him.

I know God has big plans for me. I have always felt that way, but haven’t always lived like I know it. I like comfortable. I like behind the scenes. I like letting others lead. (Though it doesn’t mean I always follow.)

But at the same time I am comfortable in positions of leadership. I am comfortable at the front of the church, and when I look back on my life, I’ve always been there.

Though I’m 34 years old, I almost feel as if I’m just starting my journey. I admit that I’ve leaned on my upbringing and teaching of my parents much more than my own learning through prayer and devotions.

Lately God’s had me tuning into the Christian AM radio stations. Yes, the ones that a lot of us skip over because they’re just talk radio and the sound quality isn’t there. My prayer to God lately has been “Teach me. Show me.”

So he’s led me to those stations. I can get an hour of teaching to and from work now.

It’s funny the battle that starts up in your flesh when the things that used to have your time and attention are replaced with the Word of God. I see old habits trying to creep up. I see old thoughts trying to come back.

Funny thing, I see them disappearing soon. The Word of God always wins.

I caught a good message from Chuck Swindoll this morning. He’s one of my favorite preacher-teachers.

Its part of series he’s calling “A Life Well Lived.”

He used Micah 6:8 as his text. It says He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God. (NIV).

The Message puts it this way, “But he's already made it plain how to live, what to do, what God is looking for in men and women. It's quite simple: Do what is fair and just to your neighbor, be compassionate and loyal in your love, And don't take yourself too seriously— take God seriously.

And there we have life, as it should be, summed up.

Then Swindoll focused on “showing mercy” today.

We don’t’ really show mercy these days. Somehow this society has become a “this for that” society. One good turn deserves another.

Actually, we’re more of a “one up” society. Whatever someone does to us, we like to respond faster, heavier, harder and hope to cause more pain.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m all for defending ourselves. But I think we take ourselves too seriously to the point where we respond to simple digs and insults with cutting words of our own.

Swindoll went into the story of Joseph and seeing his brothers in Egypt.

Genesis 45
1 Then Joseph could no longer control himself before all his attendants, and he cried out, "Have everyone leave my presence!" So there was no one with Joseph when he made himself known to his brothers. 2 And he wept so loudly that the Egyptians heard him, and Pharaoh's household heard about it.
3 Joseph said to his brothers, "I am Joseph! Is my father still living?" But his brothers were not able to answer him, because they were terrified at his presence.

4 Then Joseph said to his brothers, "Come close to me." When they had done so, he said, "I am your brother Joseph, the one you sold into Egypt! 5 And now, do not be distressed and do not be angry with yourselves for selling me here, because it was to save lives that God sent me ahead of you. 6 For two years now there has been famine in the land, and for the next five years there will not be plowing and reaping. 7 But God sent me ahead of you to preserve for you a remnant on earth and to save your lives by a great deliverance.

8 "So then, it was not you who sent me here, but God. He made me father to Pharaoh, lord of his entire household and ruler of all Egypt.

Now we all know the story of Joseph. His brothers, jealous of his coat the love he received from their father and his dreams, sold him into slavery. He ended up in prison. He found favor in prison, and eventually made it to the 2nd highest position in Egypt.

And his brothers find him there. Only they don’t know it’s him.

He plays some mind games with them, but finally comes to the point where he can’t contain himself. He tells them who he is.

Now imagine being them. You are in a land where your kid brother is basically top dog. Only Pharaoh's word trumps his. Pharaoh thinks so highly of him that I doubt he’d trump Joseph word unless it threatened Pharaoh.

If you’re the brothers, you flash back to what you said, what you did, and how you lied to your father about Joseph. You probably think, “Well this is it. This is the end. He’ll either kill us, enslave us, or jail us.” You know retribution is coming.

But what does he do?

He said, "I am your brother Joseph, the one you sold into Egypt! Don’t be distressed and do not be angry with yourselves for selling me here, because it was to save lives that God sent me ahead of you. God sent me ahead of you to preserve you and to save your lives by a great deliverance. So then, it was not you who sent me here, but God.”

He didn’t blame them.

He didn’t lash out.

He showed them mercy.

He told them to relax. They didn’t do anything. God set it up, and God sent him to Egypt for a purpose.

Imagine the relief. But then think about the mercy that was shown.

And now think about how we react to minor inconveniences and hurts.

Is our response one of mercy?

Our typical reaction doesn’t seem appropriate does it?

Post Cruise Funk

I’m kind of in a funk right now.

Things are good. Good job. Beautiful wife. Healthy baby on the way. Things are going good on all fronts.

But I think I’m in Post-Vacation depression.

I last blogged about enjoying everyday as much as I can. I doing well in that area, but have needed to remind myself of the commitment several times. Like on the morning drive when traffic was awful, just because it was raining…………no, let me rephrase, it was sprinkling.

I have caught myself thinking back to the cruise quite often the last 2 weeks. We got off the boat on the 7th, so really our last day was the 6th. Man, I miss that week. The best part about it was the fact that the week on the cruise seemed to take it’s time. Most vacations feel too short, and they are. But often times you blink and vacation is over.

This cruise was different. I don’t know if it was the overall attitude, my age, the company or maybe time really did slow down.

All I know right now is how much I miss it.

As all of us cruisers are sharing our pictures, I miss it even more. I was looking at my in-laws pictures the other day. They took great pictures of the ship, exploring, casual dining and other moments I didn't really think about. I didn’t really do any thing like take pictures of the ship or explore. Now I wish I would have.

I just emailed a coworker who is working in the Miami are these days. I mentioned how I was in the area, and my mind immediately went back to September 29th.

We arrived Saturday morning, met Jeremy and Heather at the airport, took a cab to the hotel, checked in, got lunch at Chili’s at the Bayside Market and tried to plan out the evening . At that point I was on vacation. It didn’t matter what we ordered, or how much it cost. Then a group of us went to South Beach. Like I said a week ago, I had my grumpy moments, but for the most part it was like I was living on cruise control. Pun not intended.

I don’t know if it was thoughts in the back of my head about this being the last vacation for Liza and I as “just the two of us.” I don’t know if it was a more relaxed demeanor I seemed to be in.

All I know right now is that I miss it.

I didn’t work the Monday after we returned home, but I was busy getting oil changes and running errands. Tuesday brought work back into my life, and then a supercharger attached itself to the clock and time is flying again.

I don’t know if it was the build up of 18 months of planning the cruise, only to have it go by in 7 days. It was like a year and a half of pent up excitement.

I remember the week before we left. Emails, phone calls, and voice mails were flying with the stress of last minute details of the cruise, last minute work assignments, last minute packing, and out right giddiness and excitement for the impending cruise of a lifetime.

I remember barely getting any sleep the night before as I was up late packing and cleaning, and then waking up early. I remember carpooling to the airport. The 8 of us were bouncing off the walls. We were tired, but grinning ear to ear as the big cruise was finally here.

The lines at the luggage check in didn’t bother us. The lines to get food didn’t bother us. The early flight didn’t bother us.

We were on our way to Miami.

And a day later we would be getting on the biggest cruise ship in the world.

The day of the cruise was almost perfect. We got up, got a quick breakfast, caught a shuttle to the port and I kid you not, basically walked right onto the ship.

The check in was a breeze. I remember getting our cards and checking out everyone’s card, room number and discovering that we were all together! We were pumped when we all saw the same table number on our sea passes.

When it was time to get on board, oh man! Up the escalator, around the maze and I raced the crew to be the first on board. We took a group picture and then the whirlwind began.

I do remember walking around the ship. I remember trying to look for our rooms, but not being able to get to them yet. From there, I think we went to check on our dining table, and remember the elation of the group when we found our table. We all snapped some pictures of the dining room.

We went over near the karaoke bar. We checked out the ice rink. I took a picture in the Castanza pose.

Somewhere in there we hit the Windjammer café for the first time. The guys all bought our Coke cards, that we’d been our drink break even analysis on for the past several months. We got a big round table and the crew disbanded. I wasn’t going to eat much, but Dave came back with a plate of “Tastes so good” and I got in line. I got the same thing he did, with a side of “mmmm” and a helping of “oh my gosh.” Actually, it was rice and chicken topped off followed by peanut butter cookies.

It’s then that my memory gets a little hazy. As slow as that week seemed to go, it’s all a blur.

I almost wish I could get the week back, really. I wouldn’t pass up the cookies thinking I’d get some later. Because later I was always less hungry due to a big meal or pizza run. Or I figured I had plenty of time for cookies later.

As bad as it is for me, I should’ve used the pop card more.

I wish I would’ve hit the Sprinkles ice cream station more often. Lines should not have been an excuse.

I wish I would’ve stayed out later and woken up earlier. Again, I always said, “Tomorrow. I’ll do it tomorrow.”

I wish I would’ve gone on the Flowrider.

You know, it was a good time and for the most part I wanted to just be with the group. But in a way I wish I would’ve gone off on my own from time to time.

I missed out on a lot. It’s easy to do on a cruise, and there is no way to do everything. But I really do feel like I missed on so much. I didn’t feel that way at the time, and I don’t’ regret how I spent my time. I just would’ve done more.

Because now I’m back in the grind that tends to define our lives. We work. We eat. We sleep. And we try to make room for relaxing. We book up our weekends to the point of there being no such thing as free time.

We’re pulled in so many ways these days. I have a hard time ever saying no.

Again let me say, I have a great life. My life is good.

But it’s just not life on a cruise.

Right now, that’s where I want to be.

Time Flies

I learned a lot last week. The biggest thing is:

Time flies when you’re having fun.

Or when you’re not having fun.

Time just flies.

Just last year, I was basking in my access to Tigers playoff tickets thanks to Eliza’s job with the Detroit Tigers. I was able to watch the first Tigers playoff game since 1987. They won, destroying the Yankees. Comerica Park was going nuts.

A few weeks later I was able to go to the Tigers only World Series win in the series.

Last August, we left Bethesda to start attending Living Word.

Last January, 3 nieces were born. Now they’re 9 months old!

This past September my oldest nephew Bryce turned 5!

I turned 34.

I’ve been married over 4 years!

Everywhere I look, I see time keeps moving, and seemingly faster than ever.

Just last week I was on a cruise vacation. (I can’t believe I’ve been home this long already!) Lize and I went with 10 other friends and family. It was a great vacation, but there were a couple moments where I got pretty frustrated.

It seemed we couldn’t make group decisions at times. We’d stand for minutes (seemed like hours) and go in circles with what was the best thing to do.

And when we did make a decision, I almost felt as if my voice wasn’t being heard.

That was frustrating to me. When I’m on vacation, I like to get up and go. Whether it’s going to lay out, or go on an excursion, or walk around the boat or port. I just like to be doing something. The good soldier that I am, I would go along with the group. I’d be grumpy for a little while, and go on my way.

At times I saw other people being frustrated for the same things, or for other reasons like food, outside temperature, sun, rain, taxis, room service or lack thereof.

But as I was driving to work yesterday, I realized how much time was wasted by being frustrated and grumpy.

Here I was on the biggest cruise ship in the world, not having to worry about work, traffic, work, traffic, work, traffic, fitting in other important functions and commitments, work, traffic…..and I wanted to be frustrated about not doing something I thought would be more fun.

Granted it was only a few hours in an 8 day vacation, but it was time I wasted.

So what if we walked across the street for dinner instead of driving 10 minutes to a different place. We were still able to eat good food, in good weather, with great people.

So what if it took 15 minutes to decide we wanted to eat again. We were going to be with good friends, eating good food, on the greatest cruise ship in the world.

So what if I didn’t think we needed to make a stink about where we’d play cards. We were still with good friends, playing fun games, eating good food, on the greatest cruise ship in the world.

Above that…God is good, all the time.

Just yesterday, Liza and I went for her first ultrasound. We saw the little one for the first time, and even got to hear the heartbeat.

It was awesome.

And again I realized how good God is.

And it’s up to me to choose to enjoy the moment I’m in.

We don’t know what the future holds for us. We don’t know what tomorrow holds for us. We don’t even know what the next minute holds for us.

I may never get to go on another cruise vacation.

I may never get to hang out with that group of people ever again.

This could be the only baby Liza and I ever have.

We don’t know.

We do know what the Bible says and it says our life is but a vapor. It’s gone before we know it.

So why waste it being angry, upset, frustrated, or whatever else that drags you down.

I’m only human, so I’m sure I’ll deal with it again. But right now, I’m going to do my best to enjoy every moment of my life.

Fatherhood, Friends and Stuff

Father Hood

I’m gonna be a daddy. I’m gonna be a daddy.

Well, this past Wednesday the doctor confirmed what 2 home pregnancy tests told us. Eliza is pregnant!

The original plan was about 3 years after we were married…and Wednesday was our 4 year anniversary. So not too far off. We might have been closer to 3 but we really enjoyed vacationing and our time as a couple. But with our siblings and friends having so many babies and my ever increasing age, we decided it was time.

Now we’re joining the club of parenthood.

Fatherhood is something I’ve always thought of, but it was always in the back of my mind. I know it’s going to change everything. EVERYTHING, but in a good way. I have to grow up, or at least pick my immature spots.

I’m looking forward to fatherhood.

Boy or girl? We don’t know, and won’t know until the day our baby enters the world.

It’s one of the last real surprises in this world. Maybe we’ll find out when and if we have other kids.

But for numero uno, we’re going with the tried and true, old fashioned way God intended, we’re waiting.

Friends

Yesterday we had a send off pizza party for a friend of mine who is leaving the area. He’s a manager and is moving out of the state for another job within GM.

He’s really one of the great guys in the world. He and I have had several great philosophical and biblical talks. He’s a fellow believer and has challenged me and my faith from time to time.

Well I went down a few floors to the party and there were people everywhere. And they kept coming. It was very impressive turnout and a testament to what a great guy and friend this man is to so many people.

While I was sitting there I remembered the scripture my father used to tell me, “If a man is to have friends, he must first show himself friendly.” This guy is living proof of that statement.

Someday, when I retire or leave the company I want to be able to say 60 people came to see me off. And they all could call me friend.

Friends part 2

I got an email from my boy Kenny Watson last night. I didn’t know it at first, as it was a forward and said something like “vocalnous sent you a video”. I had no idea who vocalnous was, and why were they sending me a video.

I usually delete forwards, but I opened and saw the name Kenny Watson. Clicked on the link and there was my boy Kenny singing for an American Cancer Society video with international recording artist Mike E.

Then I did a search on Mike E and came across some other videos of his. Kenny is in another video!

Then I googled “Mike-E Kenny Watson” and came across tour posters with Kenny!

Here are the links:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rvr5iOujdDs
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yvvyryDV5-c

Gotta say I’m proud of him and I’m gonna be braggin on him.

Kenny is a good friend and someone who inspired my own writing and creativity. I remember him struggling to find odd jobs and still have time to record and sing. He always had a notebook to write his poetry and his lyrics. Many times he’d run them by me.

Kenny sang at our wedding. He sang the Lord’s Prayer and a song that he wrote. We were honored then, and I’m even more honored now.

And, we’ve got it on DVD!

So when VH1 comes around looking for video of Kenny before he blew up….

Seriously, good job Ken. I’m proud of you, Brutha.

How soon we forget

So I think Detroit most sports fans are some of the most fickle people in the world. It’s like once a team sets the bar high, it has to stay there. Once the bar is high, the team isn’t allowed to struggle anymore.

It’s like people forget that that’s what competition is all about.

Getting there and staying there. And it’s tougher to stay there. It’s tough being the hunted instead of the hunter.

Injuries play a factor. Complacency plays a factor. After all, these guys are human.

Take the Tigers. Four years ago they lost 119 games! Last year they went to the World Series. At one point this year they had the best record in baseball, and then injuries and slumps all hit them.

They lost Kenny Rogers. Bonderman and Verlander started pitching poorly or at the very least inconsistently. Zumaya was down for awhile. Sheffield came on and off the DL and back on again. Yet their still in the thick of it with over 25 games to go.

But people are acting like it’s over.

It ain’t over.

Then people who bragged about the depth of the minor league system wanted the Tigers to trade it for mercenary like hired guns who would only be with them for the rest of the season.

Why? You went to the World Series with 90% of this squad, added Sheffield and rode the lineup to the best record in baseball at one point.

And fans want to blow it up?

That’s stupid. You’re competing now, challenging the top spot even, have a great farm system that should maintain an Atlanta type dominance for the near future, and people want to trade it away.

Thing is, if the Tigers made those trade, the fans would rue the day if the trade doesn’t propel them to the World Series.

It ain’t over, guys.

St. Louis had injuries last year, snuck into the playoffs and got hot at the right time. They only won 83 games during the season, but won the World Series. If the pitchers get hot at the right time. If Kenny can come back and solidify the rotation. If Zumaya, Rodney and Rogers can hold down the 7th – 9th, and if Sheff can get back in time for the last few weeks. The Tigers can still accomplish what most of their fans say they can’t do now.

It ain’t over.

Bitterness

Those of you who read the blog, know I’ve been questioning a lot of things. I don’t get a lot of the immaturity and pettiness, but lately I’ve been questioning the anger. I think I talked about it in an earlier blog, but God’s been talking to me a lot more about it.

So my first ‘Why”.

Why do we hold onto anger?

I’ve been involved in several situations where people talk about things brewing for years.

One of them was at the softball blowup. All game long guys were saying how they weren’t going to let the other team do what they’ve done for so many years. It got to be where guys were thinking the other team was cheating on just about every other play.

If someone got a hit, they had to make a comment.

If someone on the other team got a hit, someone on our team had to bark back.

Then the other team started barking back.

Then the blow up, and people excused it by saying it had been brewing for years.

Why? How can you hold onto that for so long?

Well, 2 weeks later we are headed towards playing the same guys in a different league.

It’s the playoffs. We won our first game, and so did our rivals. This sets up us facing them in the next game. As it turns out, they were going to have a tough time getting guys to play us on the scheduled day, and asked if we could set up a new date.

Like and explosion, several of our guys said, “No way! Not after what they’ve done to us.”

“Screw them!”

“That’s what they get.”

A couple guys just said no, but only because they knew who was asking for a change.

So, the original date was kept and it looked like we would be playing against a weaker version of their team, or we wouldn’t be playing at all due to forfeit.

I think God had other plans. It’s been raining for quite a while now, the game has been cancelled, and the makeup game is this week at an earlier time. It will make it tough for our guys to get there now.

Now we’ll be playing a team that know we were out to spite them and they have a good chance of having a loaded squad.

Hmmmmmm.

Anger. Was it worth it?

I’ve also been able to watch other people go through some tough times. One of them has sworn off church, and is pretty angry at God. Another is just flat out angry.

It’s natural. I know. We all experience anger.

But in its truest form doesn’t anger really only focus on us?

I know it’s natural. I know we all experience it. I know some say it’s healthy.

Is it really, though?

I’m not so sure it is. I know it feels right in the moment, but how many good decisions are made in anger?

And now time for my 2nd why.

Why do we get angry at God?

Again, it’s natural when things don’t go our way. We can’t fathom losing a loved one. We can’t fathom his ways. We can’t fathom when bad things happen to good people. We can’t fathom when bad things happen to children.

Can you fathom being God and having to give up your only son in order to save billions of selfish, self-seeking, thoughtless, thankless, unworthy ingrates? It wasn’t fair. But He did.

Can you fathom being Job and losing EVERYTHING you’ve ever had? Health. Wealth. You name it. But he never cursed God.

I’ve had a very good life. Not much has ever gone wrong. Sure I’d like to be 6’3” 200lbs of solid muscle, but it ain’t gonna happen. I’d like to make 10 times the money I have right now, and have a beautiful home on a hill overlooking a stream on my 20 acre property. It might happen, but it’s not where I am right now.

I’ve also had my share of pain. I loved and lost and lost and lost…..until God finally brought me the perfect lady when I was 29. While all my friends were getting married and having kids, I didn’t get married until I was 30.

I lost a grandfather to AIDS…because he needed a blood transfusion after surgery and he was given AIDS infected blood. One of the strongest men I ever knew was weak and frail due to the disease. And he did nothing wrong to get AIDS.

I lost a nephew to SIDS last year. He was so perfect and innocent.

I’ve spent a lot of time asking God why. And I think we can. He wants us to talk to Him.

But I don’t think we should ever get out of fellowship with Him due to wanting to be angry.

I’ve had to train myself to be thankful and praise in the storm. It’s so unnatural. I do it by thanking God for the things I do have, instead of focusing on what I don’t have, or what I think is being taken away. I had a lot of good years with my grandparents. I’ll never forget my nephews beautiful personality and smile.

When I read the bible and see what the bible hall of fame went through, it was never easy. Abraham, Moses, Jacob, Samson, David……They all went through trying times, but they’re hall of fame for correcting it. Things always got out of whack when they tried to do it their way. But when they turned it back to God, things turned around.

We have to remember. God is in charge. Like it or not, He’s boss.

We’ll do all we can to do it our way. I mean, that’s how it’s been all our lives. We’ve been able to take care of ourselves, our families, our way of life for so long. We like to think we did it. But there is no such thing as a self made man. God orchestrated it all. He orchestrated the jobs, the connections, the deals….We are nothing without Him.

I think a lot of times, we as Americans think we can solve it all by ourselves. For some reason Americans are born with an ultra selfish gene. It’s developed and enhanced as we grow up as we’re taught that’s how you do things. Do it your way.

When we grow up we lean on our health benefits before God. We lean on our paycheck before God. We lean on our friends before God. We lean on our connections before God.

And when those things fail us, we get angry. It is then we either go to God, or turn from God.

I think a lot of times God uses the tough times to soften us. He’s got something He wants to do in us. The more I think about it, He probably has for awhile, but we don’t’ pick it up until He gets our attention.

But here’s the irony of the tough times. We can allow them to soften us and make us sensitive to God. Or we can harden our heart.

Hardening our hearts makes us bitter and bitterness is like a drug. You need more of it in order to keep going. It leads to sarcasm and cynicism. We lose our smile. We lose our joy.

Don’t’ go down that road.

Don’t’ ever let anger take hold. Feel it. Understand it. Talk to God about it, and let it go.

Being angry, going it alone, will never ever solve a thing.