Contemplating

You know, it's crazy. As much as I feel like I missed out on so much time with my family on vacation, it gave me time to think.

As I continue to unpack from the vacation, I still think about how quickly this vacation seemed to move. I still can't believe it. Obviously, I can look at a calendar and see we were there from the 21st to the 27th. And I still have 3 full days of vacation ahead of me. So it's not like things are bad.

I can see how the time flew by....our boys actually slept in til 8 or 9 most mornings up there. From there, the days almost go in 2-3 hour increments. Breakfast and showers...2 hours (There were 6 of us in the condo...). Then the first activity of the day, whatever that was, capped off by lunch....2-3 hours. Then, naps....2-3 hours. Get ready for dinner, whether at the condo or going out...2-3 hours. Then, let the kids play for awhile, pajamas, kids go to bed....2 hours. Games...2-3 hours. In bed by midnight, wake up at 8, do it all again.

Now it's easy to see how the time flew by.

And even though I felt like I didn't get any time with Liza and the boys, I feel like we didn't get enough time with our friends either. Maybe I've reached that age where chilling out is my favorite thing to do.

But before anyone reads into this and thinks I have regrets about the vacation. I really don't. My only regret is that it ended so quickly.

So as I left Boyne, I realized 2/3 of my vacation was done. I had 4 days left at home, and back to the grind. My next vacation won't be til some time in August, and even that one is going to be a long road trip. So I bet it will fly by too.

Liza and I have talked about work and the hours....I don't see that changing anytime soon. I'm going to try to get in earlier, but that doesn't necessarily mean I get to go home earlier. I'm committed to my career right now, but we talked about a career change down the road, to something that is more fulfilling. We talked about a writing/authoring career, but I have no idea how to get that going. But to start, I may get this blog thing going again, and hope to build an audience.

The irony there is I don't really have that much time to write. There's not enough time in the day.

How do you slow down time? It seems like time continues to pick up speed. You blink and you miss something.

And like Aerosmith said, "I don't wanna miss a thing..."

Before You Know It

We returned from our vacation up North yesterday afternoon. It was a good time but it just wasn't enough. And honestly, I've been depressed since we pulled the car out of the Boyne condo and headed home. I fought back tears the entire drive home, and finally around 7 last night, they made their way out.

Now you may ask how I can be depressed after a vacation. I keep asking myself that. After almost a day of reflection, I think I know why.

The Nathan Hood family hasn't vacationed since last fall back when we took a weekend trip to Chicago and a weekend trip to the Great Wolf Lodge. Ever since then we've been cooped up in the condo, and the hours and stress at work have grown more than I ever would have thought.

So back when Linz invited us and other friends to share a few condos up at Boyne, we jumped at the chance. It would be very cheap, away from here, away from work, and just a time to get away with the family. We ended up with 6 couples when Jeremy and Heather decided to join us. This had the makings of being a fantastic vacation.

But time just flew as we got closer to the vacation. Work was busier....9-10 hour days became 11-12 hour days and working from home. If I was lucky, I'd see Jakin and Grant for an hour every day. I'd see Liza for maybe 2 hours before one of us was so tired we just went to bed.But I kept telling myself vacation was right around the corner.

So vacation eve came....we did our packing, got the boys in bed, and waited for the Burkes to get here. That was Thursday, May 20th. Friday showed up and I hit the chiropractor, came home, went to pick up the new car...which took much longer than expected. We left around 3pm, when the plan was 1:30 or 2 pm. The Burkes followed us as we drove up I 75....but since we left late, we screwed up the boys napping schedule. It wasn't a quiet ride up. Then I realized I hadn't filled up with gas, so we had to stop. We hit Gaylord and the boys had reached their limit. We stopped and got some food, then hit the road for the last 30 minutes of the trip.

We checked in and pretty much did nothing the rest of the evening. Everything is a blur after that and I think it's the root of my being depressed. Vacation was over before you knew it. It almost felt like we got up there, went to bed, woke up and had to come home. But we were there almost an entire week!

Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed my time. I got to relax, go to the pool, go to the waterpark, play 2 rounds of golf, spend time with family and friends. But it was done before it got started. Friday to Thursday happened to fast.

And what I realized was as much fun as I was having, I wasn't getting the time with the 3 most important people in my life. Liza, Jakin and Grant. I get so little time with them that I really had big plans on just being with them. We didn't have one minute of "just the 4 of us" other than the time in the car. We planned on hitting Charlevoix yesterday....when most of the vacation crew had left. It was going to be the Hood only day. Well, we woke up to Grant throwing up, and decided to come home.

So as we left the resort, I thought back to my favorite moments. And those were with the Hood 4. I got to nap with Jake, which I hadn't done since he was an infant. I watched Jake become braver in the water, to the point where he loves swimming now. I'll never forget that moment. When we made our first trip to the pool, he would hardly go in. We went to the water park and about an hour before we left, he started to enjoy the pool.

So when we made our next trip to the resort pool, Jake put his swimmies on and started walking out deeper than he ever did before. And smiled and laughed. He wanted to swim to the ladders, and to people. He would run out and back in. He started kicking his legs...it was one of my favorite moments as a parent. He loved the pool so much that when we told him we were going to the pool he'd instantly lay down in front of us to change him into his swimmies and swimsuit.

During the trip he was finally brave enough to run on the playscape by himself. He started going down the big slide by himself. He wanted to walk by himself....Even Grant seemed to be walking and talking more. They were...they are...growing up.

So maybe that's where my depressed slide starts? I hit me that I don't have much longer with the boys at this stage. I have loved the baby/infant/toddler stage. So here I was on vacation, when I should have spent more time than ever with them, and we were leaving the resort to go back home. Vacation came. Vacation went. And vacation was over before I knew it.

Back home to our condo. Back home to the same ol' same ol' days of Macomb County. Back to every day life. Probably back to long hours of work.

No more hopping in the car for a little road trip. No more opportunities so say, "Jake. Wanna walk down to the pool?" and see him light up and scream "Yes!". No more of him yelling "Deeeve" or "Chrever" or "Wanny" across the pool. No more having the boys sleeping in our room and listening to the sleep. No more walking across the parking lot in our sandals to go to the playscape or pool. All those things that were making my vacation so memorable and enjoyable were done before I knew it.

We didn't get to have our family day. I'd trade every minute on the golf course this past week for more time with the family. I'd trade every hand of cards played this weekend for another trip to the pool or jungle gym with Jakin. I want that day back.

To my vacation friends, thank you for the opportunity to spend time with you guys, so don't read this as I didn't have fun, or that I didn't want to be near you. I did enjoy myself and the fun and fellowship with you all. But I'm starting to realize just how little time I have with my family and my boys. Especially at this time of their lives. We only have so much time before they grow up.

For those of you with little ones now or have them on the way, cherish your time with them when they are little. Protect your family time. The golf courses will always be there. The games aren't going anywhere. But those hours they are awake, spend as much time with them as you can. Be with them. Play with them. Love them. Because those days will be gone before you know it.