Ah, the Nineties

It was a slow television night, other than the Office.

We put the kids to bed, and I started channel surfing around 8pm. I narrowed it down to watching an NBA game (Miserable these days, I miss the 90's) or Saturday Night Live: the 90's.

SNL won.

It's amazing how much that crew impacted the way people my age think and act. Okay, maybe a little overblown, but man, put a bunch of 30 somethings together and talk about Farley, Sandler, Myers, Spade....and we'd be laughing in no time, and for hours.

As I watched, I couldn't help but reminisce on a great decade. I was born in the 70's, raised by the 80's and grew up in the 90's. The 90's were great.

As far as the show, it wasn't innocent humor, but the things they did then that might have "pushed the limits" wouldn't make people blush today. Not saying it's right but it wasn't over the top like today's stuff.

Back then, as weird as that is to say, people weren't so sensitive. You could crack a joke on a politician and it was just that a joke. You didn't have a critic taking apart everything they did.

Personally, I had alot of great times. I lost the braces and glasses. I had great summer and winter jobs to help get me through college. I felt like I still had the "seasons" in my life. Summer, Fall (College), Winter (1 more semester of college), Spring (just a few more weeks of college) and Summer again.

I met some great people who became great friends. I don't see many of them anymore, but I do think fondly of those times. They helped me become me. There were heartaches and heartbreaks, but they toughened me up.

There was alot of laughing. Alot of late nights shooting hoops. Working out and getting ripped. Mondays playing 45 holes of golf. Breaking 80 for 18 holes. Softball championships. Getting my first real job.

The nineties brought us (or in my world, brought me) the Fab 5. Those guys changed college hoops from style of play to style of the uniforms. Baggy shorts and black socks. I'll admit it, I rocked those things within weeks of C Webb and Jalen breaking em out.

Shaq was becoming "The Most Dominant Player Ever", in his own words.

The Pistons drafted Grant Hill. A class act athlete who was supposed to change the game. Fill the void left by Michael Jordan....Ah, yes. I started my Jordan collection in the 90's.

The late 90's brought us Tiger Woods, who until recently was my all-time favorite athlete.

I gravitated to Deion Sanders. I just like the swagger that those guys brought. I've always gravitated or was a fan of athletes or people that had a swagger. Stand tall and stand proud.

Maybe it was because I was (am) short and reserved. I lived vicariously, I don't know. But they had fun too.

Those are things I try to exude today. Pride, strength, confidence and swagger. And I like to have fun.

But I digress. All I really wanted to say is that I enjoyed the nineties. They made a mark on my life. Now...

"Lay off me I'm starving!...Or you'll be living in a van down by the river...."

Light's not on, but someone is home

No light on, but I've been home. It's been awhile....

Don't have to like it, do I?

But it is frustrating having a passion, and what you see as a gift, not be utilized to it's full capacity.

Am I just too caught up in life as I know it?

It's a good life, but not where I thought I'd be. I sat down at the computer tonight (our new iMac), and said to Liza, this is me. This is where I feel at home.

Blogging. Trying to let creativity flow. I'm listening to Lifehouse, and I relate to a lot of their music. It has deeper meaning, a sense of something that reaches out and touches other peoples lives.

I've noticed over the last 6 months just how much I enjoy being with people, talking with people, listening to people. I like people and I think people like me.

So spending my days within the 3 walls of my cubicle can wear on me. I realize how blessed I am. Even the past weekend, as I drove a brand new car for the weekend, I realized how blessed we are. I'm blessed to have a job that pays the bills and even some more.

Liza took the Grant to the doctor, and the report was "perfect" as always. And then we paid the small copay, and she went on her way.

It's those times that I say to myself it's best to keep doing what I'm doing. Don't rock the boat. We've got it good. But....there's still a longing to do and be more.

I sit here trying to write and be creative, and the very thing that holds me back from pursuing dreams and aspirations is the same thing that always has, fear. Fear of failing. Fear of not being able to provide for my wife and kids.

As Liza and I played with the computer tonight, we started going through the pictures on the computer. We accumulated alot of pictures over the last 7+ years. We've changed so much. We saw pictures of our friends and laughed at how we have less hair, more wrinkles, more bags under eyes, more weight....

I started going through the pics of my boys. Man, from March of 2008 til now. The joy I've found in my growing family, but also realized how that's when the stress at work began to grow. Not coincidentally, that's when the economy started changing.

Every month the worry of maybe not having a job. The paycuts. Fewer and fewer benefits. Switching jobs...

I find peace with my family. My friends. My God.

People have said things to me recently when they see me...In so many words they say "It's nice to see you smile again."

And I realized I don't smile as much as I used to. As Buddy the Elf said, "Smiling's my favorite." Yet somehow it's been hard for me to smile, at least as often as much as I used to.

Maybe since I'm knocking on the door of 40, I'm taking inventory of what I've done and haven't done. It seems like it.

I gotta get there. We were all created for a purpose and I know mine is much bigger than me, than the me I see right now.

As I continue typing, I am reminded of all the special appointments in life. God has no doubt blessed me. I'll say it again, I'm blessed to be where I am.

But the moments that I remember, the moments that other people remember are the ones one someone's life has been touched. A smile. A kind word. Just asking how someone is doing. Allowing God to shine through me.

It's the moments when you are a light, or better yet when YOU are God's light to someone.

While I walk this path. As I go down the road, no knowing if there is another turn, or another pot hole, I'll be a light.

I'll keep the light on.

No more limits

Where is this going?

As you could probably tell from my last post, I'm thinking about life these days. There's got to be more to this life.

Now, I'm a God fearing man. I know He's got a plan for me. Right now, I just wish He'd share that plan for me. Have you ever been in a place where you wonder what you're doing or what should you really be doing?

I'm a pretty rational thinker. I tend to deal in realism. So much that I think it hurts me sometimes. Rational, realistic thinking has limited my reach. It’s caused me to undream my dreams.

We went out with some close friends Friday night, and I was mentally drained from a long day of work. It took me a few hours to finally unwind, but I took in alot of the conversation. Alot of it was around dreams.

Ironically, that's been on my mind and heart lately. What are my hopes and dreams? And how did I get so far from those dreams?

One of our friends said he recently asked his wife," Where do you see yourself in 10 years?"

I believe her reply was she didn't know. And for good reason. When you are waiting and trusting the Lord, how can you know? If you follow His leading, you go to where he leads you. That's where you'll be.

That's hard to fathom in today's world. Everyone maps out a plan for their life, but how often do we run it by God? In high school, they prep us for college and you start to outline where you want to go to school, where you go for Grad school, and then what will that career choice be which gets you to six figures faster.

That becomes what defines us. Career. Achievement. Wealth.

What is starting to drive me these days is fulfillment. And being truly fulfilled is going where He wants you to go. That’s what I want to define me.

This weekend I saw friends who were sweethearts when we went in high school. I hadn’t seen them in 10 years. His career is what he was born to be as he is a music and worship leader at his church. His talent was obvious back then. He followed the leading and there he is.

They look so fulfilled and had such joy. More inspiration.

Right now, I’m holding onto Jeremiah 29:11, “For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

God’s been with me every step of the way to date, why would I even think He wouldn’t be with me going forward, or worse that He’s not with me now.

Why should I start to doubt God? Can I limit a God who has no limits? I was starting to say God can’t or won’t do things. I began to look at things the way we, well, look at things. By what we see, or by what we’ve seen.

Where do I want to be in 10 years? Not where I am now, sitting in a chair wondering how I get "there." I don't know where I'll be in 10 years, but I'm saying today it won't be in the same place.

It won't be looking back at the things I could have done, or the things I said I was going to do.

No more limits.

Dreams

It’s been a week since the last day of my 5 day vacation. We spent 4 of the last 5 days visiting friends in Tennessee. Though we were only gone a short time, it was a fun, relaxing trip. But my wife put it more accurately. It was inspiring. It sounds like a strange way to describe a vacation? I mean, you don’t usually go away for a few days and say a vacation was inspiring, but this one truly was.

I think part of it was we escaped our bubble, our comfort zone, for a few days and saw how life outside of it can be. When you can’t rely on daily habits and routine, things are fresh, exciting and yes, inspiring.

Our friends were probably the most inspiring part of the trip. It was refreshing to be around dreamers. Dreamers in the sense that they know what they hope to be and have, and then do what they can to go after the dreams.

I was that guy for awhile, but life got in the way. I’m not saying my wife and boys got in the way. Not at all. If anything, they helped keep the dream somewhat alive in me.

But often as adults, dreams give way to reality. And the reality is paying bills, maintaining homes and cars, trying to fit things into a chaotic schedule. It becomes a grind. Wake up at 6, hit snooze, roll over for 10 minutes, maybe hit snooze again. Then shuffle to the shower, get dressed, brush your teeth, grab breakfast in a package and hit the road for our 30 minute commute to the office.

We’re already buried in work by the time we get there. Yet by the end of the day we buried even further.

Yes, the American dream.

Somehow it’s supposed to be expected these days. With high unemployment rates, we are blessed to have jobs when we have them. People work knowing that if they complain, they run the risk of losing their job. They can’t walk away because they’ll be out in the street with the other nearly 10% of Americans.

Vacations as Americans aren’t vacations nearly as much as they used to be either. The wonders of today’s technology make each person a mobile office. All you need is a phone or blackberry and a laptop. I tried my hardest this past vacation to unplug as best as I could. I did a fair job, but in the back of my mind I knew the workload when I returned would be huge.

I tend to internalize as not to be a complainer. I keep it all in so I don't burden anyone else. I’ll work through meals to get things done. I’ll work late and cut out sleep to catch up. Then I’ll lay awake at night thinking about the first thing I need to get done the next morning. Well, that causes someone prone to stress induced migraines to have a nice spike in frequency of the headaches.

And it’s been brutal. Even my trips to the chiropractor haven’t helped as much as they did 6 months to a year ago. There was a stretch in the spring of 2009 where I went migraine free for a month. These days, I’m lucky if I only have 1 a week.

I’ve had CAT scans and MRI’s. Everything comes back normal. Doctors have prescribed muscle relaxers and beta blockers to reduce the frequency. Doctors have suggested Topomax for prevention, which seems to work in many patients. But the side effects are just as scary as the migraines.

I’ve been a diagnosed migraine sufferer for over 10 years now, but I can remember back to having bad headaches in my teens. So I’ve probably had them all my life. I often wonder if I have post concussion syndrome from times where I cracked my head on the road, or fell off a porch, or did something stupid to my cranium.

But I digressed for this reason, maybe if I was living my dream, and out of the rat race, I’d have fewer headaches.

It’s called a rat race because it’s a trap. You go through the maze in front of you, in search of the cheese. But it’s a trap. You search and search, but all you end up getting is a piece of cheese. In actuality, we want freedom and to find a way out. The dream is to be free.

I dream of a day when I’m not a robot, when I’m not a servant to the system. In that dream, I’m not 65 either. In my dream, I’m still a young man and the world is my oyster. In my dream, maybe I’m an author or I have a role where I help and encourage people.

In my dream, I can wake up and decide what I want to do that day. Maybe I go to my home office and write some more. Maybe I take the family on a daytrip on a whim. Maybe I drive the boys to school and let my wife sleep in. In my dream, I take a few days off to truly unwind, rest, relax and recharge.

In my dream, I’m living my dream.

It’s just hard to dream that dream when you don’t have time to sleep.

Freedom

So the other night, Liza and I and the boys went to see the Mt. Clemens fireworks with our buddy Mario. Oh, the sights we saw....

And then the fireworks started.

The most entertaining part of the evening was people watching. A festival or carnival brings out some of the best people watching one could EVER ask for.

Entertaining, but sad and scary at the same time.

I wanted to ask every other person (or so it seemed) what they were thinking. Seems like more than half the girls or women had their rear ends or upper halfs hanging out. The dudes were all walking around acting all strong. People smoking dope on the street corner, in the presence of the police who were too busy to do anything. Though there was no drinking allowed down in the carnival and fireworks, it doesn't mean people weren't blitzed when they got there.

I wanted to ask the young kids where their parents were, or better yet where they've been for the last 10 years. Then I realized I'd have to ask the parents where their parents were when they were growing up too.

It's sad to me. I really do feel that this generation doesn't have much hope. The kids don't have a chance. Even scarier, I think they believe they don't have a chance.

They know dad's not home and might never be home. They know mom is often too busy to care since she has to take care of raising kids and providing for the family.

Imagine a world without hope. Would you care what you were doing if you had no hope? Would you care how you acted if you had no hope?

With no hope, the answer probably is nope.

The sad part is people don't realize they have a choice. Just because mom or dad were an alcoholic or ran out on them, doesn't mean they have to run out on their family, or be addicted to the bottle.

Just because Dad didn't work, doesn't mean they don't have to care.

But until people realize it, a family could stay in the same sick cycle for years and generations.

The 4th of July is independence day. The day America celebrates it's freedom. Ironically, I see Americans today who are not acting so free. Their enslaved to bad choices. Their enslaved to the world they see, but their world is really only their lives as they live them.

Freedom. The right to be wrong, not the right to choose wrong.

It's the 4th of July, and I just wish more people knew what if felt like to be totally and truly free.

Contemplating

You know, it's crazy. As much as I feel like I missed out on so much time with my family on vacation, it gave me time to think.

As I continue to unpack from the vacation, I still think about how quickly this vacation seemed to move. I still can't believe it. Obviously, I can look at a calendar and see we were there from the 21st to the 27th. And I still have 3 full days of vacation ahead of me. So it's not like things are bad.

I can see how the time flew by....our boys actually slept in til 8 or 9 most mornings up there. From there, the days almost go in 2-3 hour increments. Breakfast and showers...2 hours (There were 6 of us in the condo...). Then the first activity of the day, whatever that was, capped off by lunch....2-3 hours. Then, naps....2-3 hours. Get ready for dinner, whether at the condo or going out...2-3 hours. Then, let the kids play for awhile, pajamas, kids go to bed....2 hours. Games...2-3 hours. In bed by midnight, wake up at 8, do it all again.

Now it's easy to see how the time flew by.

And even though I felt like I didn't get any time with Liza and the boys, I feel like we didn't get enough time with our friends either. Maybe I've reached that age where chilling out is my favorite thing to do.

But before anyone reads into this and thinks I have regrets about the vacation. I really don't. My only regret is that it ended so quickly.

So as I left Boyne, I realized 2/3 of my vacation was done. I had 4 days left at home, and back to the grind. My next vacation won't be til some time in August, and even that one is going to be a long road trip. So I bet it will fly by too.

Liza and I have talked about work and the hours....I don't see that changing anytime soon. I'm going to try to get in earlier, but that doesn't necessarily mean I get to go home earlier. I'm committed to my career right now, but we talked about a career change down the road, to something that is more fulfilling. We talked about a writing/authoring career, but I have no idea how to get that going. But to start, I may get this blog thing going again, and hope to build an audience.

The irony there is I don't really have that much time to write. There's not enough time in the day.

How do you slow down time? It seems like time continues to pick up speed. You blink and you miss something.

And like Aerosmith said, "I don't wanna miss a thing..."

Before You Know It

We returned from our vacation up North yesterday afternoon. It was a good time but it just wasn't enough. And honestly, I've been depressed since we pulled the car out of the Boyne condo and headed home. I fought back tears the entire drive home, and finally around 7 last night, they made their way out.

Now you may ask how I can be depressed after a vacation. I keep asking myself that. After almost a day of reflection, I think I know why.

The Nathan Hood family hasn't vacationed since last fall back when we took a weekend trip to Chicago and a weekend trip to the Great Wolf Lodge. Ever since then we've been cooped up in the condo, and the hours and stress at work have grown more than I ever would have thought.

So back when Linz invited us and other friends to share a few condos up at Boyne, we jumped at the chance. It would be very cheap, away from here, away from work, and just a time to get away with the family. We ended up with 6 couples when Jeremy and Heather decided to join us. This had the makings of being a fantastic vacation.

But time just flew as we got closer to the vacation. Work was busier....9-10 hour days became 11-12 hour days and working from home. If I was lucky, I'd see Jakin and Grant for an hour every day. I'd see Liza for maybe 2 hours before one of us was so tired we just went to bed.But I kept telling myself vacation was right around the corner.

So vacation eve came....we did our packing, got the boys in bed, and waited for the Burkes to get here. That was Thursday, May 20th. Friday showed up and I hit the chiropractor, came home, went to pick up the new car...which took much longer than expected. We left around 3pm, when the plan was 1:30 or 2 pm. The Burkes followed us as we drove up I 75....but since we left late, we screwed up the boys napping schedule. It wasn't a quiet ride up. Then I realized I hadn't filled up with gas, so we had to stop. We hit Gaylord and the boys had reached their limit. We stopped and got some food, then hit the road for the last 30 minutes of the trip.

We checked in and pretty much did nothing the rest of the evening. Everything is a blur after that and I think it's the root of my being depressed. Vacation was over before you knew it. It almost felt like we got up there, went to bed, woke up and had to come home. But we were there almost an entire week!

Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed my time. I got to relax, go to the pool, go to the waterpark, play 2 rounds of golf, spend time with family and friends. But it was done before it got started. Friday to Thursday happened to fast.

And what I realized was as much fun as I was having, I wasn't getting the time with the 3 most important people in my life. Liza, Jakin and Grant. I get so little time with them that I really had big plans on just being with them. We didn't have one minute of "just the 4 of us" other than the time in the car. We planned on hitting Charlevoix yesterday....when most of the vacation crew had left. It was going to be the Hood only day. Well, we woke up to Grant throwing up, and decided to come home.

So as we left the resort, I thought back to my favorite moments. And those were with the Hood 4. I got to nap with Jake, which I hadn't done since he was an infant. I watched Jake become braver in the water, to the point where he loves swimming now. I'll never forget that moment. When we made our first trip to the pool, he would hardly go in. We went to the water park and about an hour before we left, he started to enjoy the pool.

So when we made our next trip to the resort pool, Jake put his swimmies on and started walking out deeper than he ever did before. And smiled and laughed. He wanted to swim to the ladders, and to people. He would run out and back in. He started kicking his legs...it was one of my favorite moments as a parent. He loved the pool so much that when we told him we were going to the pool he'd instantly lay down in front of us to change him into his swimmies and swimsuit.

During the trip he was finally brave enough to run on the playscape by himself. He started going down the big slide by himself. He wanted to walk by himself....Even Grant seemed to be walking and talking more. They were...they are...growing up.

So maybe that's where my depressed slide starts? I hit me that I don't have much longer with the boys at this stage. I have loved the baby/infant/toddler stage. So here I was on vacation, when I should have spent more time than ever with them, and we were leaving the resort to go back home. Vacation came. Vacation went. And vacation was over before I knew it.

Back home to our condo. Back home to the same ol' same ol' days of Macomb County. Back to every day life. Probably back to long hours of work.

No more hopping in the car for a little road trip. No more opportunities so say, "Jake. Wanna walk down to the pool?" and see him light up and scream "Yes!". No more of him yelling "Deeeve" or "Chrever" or "Wanny" across the pool. No more having the boys sleeping in our room and listening to the sleep. No more walking across the parking lot in our sandals to go to the playscape or pool. All those things that were making my vacation so memorable and enjoyable were done before I knew it.

We didn't get to have our family day. I'd trade every minute on the golf course this past week for more time with the family. I'd trade every hand of cards played this weekend for another trip to the pool or jungle gym with Jakin. I want that day back.

To my vacation friends, thank you for the opportunity to spend time with you guys, so don't read this as I didn't have fun, or that I didn't want to be near you. I did enjoy myself and the fun and fellowship with you all. But I'm starting to realize just how little time I have with my family and my boys. Especially at this time of their lives. We only have so much time before they grow up.

For those of you with little ones now or have them on the way, cherish your time with them when they are little. Protect your family time. The golf courses will always be there. The games aren't going anywhere. But those hours they are awake, spend as much time with them as you can. Be with them. Play with them. Love them. Because those days will be gone before you know it.

Lunch Time Analysis - Hockey Style

I did a little lunch time analysis…since the whining was getting to be too much.

Let’s compare 2 players. Player 1 is loved and adored. Player 2 is not.

Player 1:
· Stands 5’11
· One of only a few players to win a Stanley Cup and Olympic Gold medal in the same year
· Named captain of his hockey team at the age of 21, youngest in NHL history
· Youngest player in an all-star game at age 18
· Finished 2nd in Rookie of the year voting
· In his first 4 years he scored 89, 89, 42 (injury) and 90 points
· His 5th year was his break out year in terms of points, reaching 50 goals for the first time
· Arguably one of the top 3 players in the NHL at the peak of his career
· Compared with Lemieux and Gretzky
· Impressed by work ethic, skills of player #2
· Won a Lester Pearson award…best player voted by his peers.

Player 2:
· Stands 5’11
· One of only a few players to win a Stanley Cup and Olympic Gold medal in the same year
· Named captain of his hockey team at the age of 19, youngest in NHL history
· Finished 2nd in Rookie of the year voting
· Youngest player to score 100 points in single season
· In his first 4 years he scored 102, 120, 72 (injury) and 103 points
· His 5th year was his break out year in terms of points, on pace for 50 goals for the first time.
· Arguably one of the top 3 players in the NHL at this point in his career
· Compared with Lemieux and Gretzky
· Idolized player #1 when growing up
· Won a Lester Pearson award…best player voted by his peers.

Player #1 = Steve Yzerman, loved and adored
Player #2 = Sidney Crosby, hated and loathed

Yet, they are nearly identical players.

Detroit fans laugh when Crosby is called the best player in the NHL. Though he may not be THE best, he is clearly one of the top players. Recall the days of Yzerman in this town, and you will remember the pining we did for Stevie to be called the best player in the league. We’d say “He’s more complete….He plays defense….Mario and Gretzky have better players around them.”

So now we say a guy who has identical…better stats…. than our beloved Stevie is not that great at all. We say Ovechkin is the best and he may be. But last I checked, he’s never won a Stanley Cup or Gold Medal. In fact, he’s never scored as many points as Crosby in a season, as his highest point total is 112 points. Although, he has scored more goals, and has won multiple Pearson and Hart trophies.

Truth be told, it’s a very subjective argument. But I tend to thing locally it’s subject to the insecurity or inferiority complex of the Detroit sports fan. Detroit fans don’t take losing well and we discredit the other team various ways.

1. By whining about unfair officiating or preferential treatment
2. We blame injuries
3. We say the other team isn’t that good and we played bad

We pine to have superstars here, but when they don’t come we say we didn’t need them anyhow. We’ve booed Jordan and Lebron. Yet they were or are clearly the best players in their leagues at their times. We’ve run stars like Grant Hill out of town because they weren’t “tough” enough. We whine when superstars don’t come to Detroit as a free agent. When we lose to them, it’s because we don’t have superstars. When we beat them it’s because they really aren’t superstars. We’ve often made it clear in this town that we don’t like superstars, and with that we underrate how good superstars actually are. We take pride in tough, gritty players, and from what I can read Crosby is that, but with a lot of skill too.

So why is Crosby overrated in our minds? Look at the stats. Look at the accomplishments. Line by line they are the same or better than “The Captain’s”. I think I could also argue that scoring is tougher these days than in the glory days of numbers 99, 66 and 19. So doesn’t that make Crosby’s numbers better? I tend to think that if we had Crosby in Detroit we’d love him. We’d argue that he is one of the best and that Ovechkin isn’t because of Ovechkin hasn’t won anything yet. That’s what we said about Jordan until he won 6 titles. That’s what we said about Lebron till the Cavs rolled through Detroit time and again.

I cheer as much as the next person when my team beats a star studded roster. But you have to give credit where credit is due. Some players are stars, plain and simple. Hate him because he’s a Penguin, but simply saying he’s overrated because we don’t like them, or we don’t have them is ridiculous.

The Pondering

What’s to ponder?

By ponder, I mean think about, reflect, consider….That’s where I am at right now.

Still, what’s to ponder?

I am pondering just how God does take care of us. But I am pondering that I don’t know how he will. We put so much on ourselves, but He alone is the great provider. No matter what life brings at us.

I’m pondering how and why.

I’m pondering how glad I am that I didn’t let doubt and worry creep in and take root in my thought life.

I’m also pondering how even though we may feel our lives are on shifting sand, they aren’t when we trust in the Lord.

I’m pondering how I got here, and now where “there” may be.

I’m pondering how one road turned into several and how each one is a blessing.

So as you see, there is nothing to worry about, but a lot to ponder.

And I’m pondering how wonder and ponder are spelled almost identically but hardly pronounced the same.

Friday Random Rants

Eating like a king
Earlier today, I posted what a local White Castle sign says. It reads “Make your Valentines Day reservation today”. I think I laughed loudly as I drove past the intersection of 8 mile and Gratiot. But come to find out, it’s a legit thing. I’ve been informed that select WC’s across the country do this and they actually sell out. The y put out table cloths, candles, and the whole nine. I would’ve never guessed it.

Generations
As I drove home yesterday listening to sports talk radio, I listened to the guys talk about the SEC as the premier conference in college football. It was used as an argument about why Lane Kiffin would leave Tennessee to go to USC. One of the on-air personalities mentioned LSU and my mind quickly moved to the 90-92 LSU basketball era.

Why that era? It’s when I boarded the Shaq train. I watched just about every LSU game I could. It was obvious how dominant he was in college and how dominant he could be in the NBA. I was a huge fan.

But why do I bring that up? As I thought about it, I realized:

(1) That I’m getting old.
(2) Every generation, or maybe every 10 -15 years the next “Insert legend” comes along

Today’s media and today’s kids all talk about how dominant Dwight Howard is. They fall all over his humorous antics, thunder dunks, and overall size.

Shaq was that guy long before Dwight Howard. Actually, they wish they could be Shaq of back then. That’s not age bias either. Check the stats. They can’t touch what he was doing.

He rocked the Superman logo tattoo. He had the Superman logo on his vehicle’s grilles, gate to his house, etc. etc.

But nowadays, people see Fat Shaq. They see the injured Shaq. They see the Shaq that helps Lebron, instead of the Shaq that was the MDP, Most Dominant Player. In my opinion he’s gotta be one of the top 10 players of all time.

But I digress.

I started thinking how now I’m the guy who’s saying things like “Dwight Howard is great, but he’s no Shaq” to the younger generation. I’ve now seen some great players come and go. Guys who when they came into their sports were the stars of tomorrow. I loved basketball in the late 80’s and early 90’s so those are the careers I can think of off hand.

I think of Chris Webber, Penny Hardaway, Shaq, Grant Hill, Antonio McDyess…..Those are the bigger names. Chris Webber was the next Karl Malone. McDyess was a beast. Penny was the next Magic Johnson. Ya gotta wonder how things might have turned out for those guys and their franchises if they didn’t get hurt. Grant Hill was gonna save the NBA after Jordan retired…And Shaq. I already mentioned him.

I didn’t even mention Kobe and Kevin Garnett….Allen Iverson.

The thing is those guys could legitimately ball. I look at the guys coming out of high school and college these days and not many can ball like the guys coming out in the early 90’s. That might be the last great era of the NBA.

I saw a stat last night where 2009 has the fewest McDonalds All Americans averaging double figure points, and/or rebounds. The analyst blames a lot of it on entitlement, and flat out lack of skill. Today’s kids seem to get by more on athletic ability than improving their skills.

It’s sad really. My generation could be one of the last to say “But you should’ve seen ‘enter legend name’ play. He was so much better than today’s guys…”

Today’s generation
Along the same lines, I had a conversation with a friend the other day about high school sports. One of his best friends coaches varsity basketball and is apparently somewhat frustrated with his team. From what I know, they have a decent amount of talent. But the kids don’t want to be coached. They want their playing time, they want their shots, and not much more. They don’t realize how much it takes to actually improve at a sport or skill.

Again…is it entitlement? Do we give kids too much these days? Do they have a case of the flu…that is, affluenza? I first heard that word about the former Detroit mayor Kwame Kilpatrick. Basically it said he is the poster child for affluenza…the sickness of affluence, or being given too much. Or at least too much too soon.

Are we failing our kids by wanting or trying to give them so much? I had a great childhood and never had near the things today’s kids have. I had chores. We had to work for things. We didn’t have to work as much as maybe our parents did as kids, but there was correlation between earning something instead of just being given something.

What is it? Is it our insecurities of what other parents give their kids? Is it keeping up with the Joneses? Is it us trying to show some level of achievement? Is it us not wanting to be the parents of kids “that don’t this or that?”

Another radio show talked about the degrading social skills of today’s kids too. I don’t know if they’ve totally degraded, but they are very different than ours. They socialize through text messages and online video games. Many don’t know how to carry verbal conversations, or at the very least they are uncomfortable with them.

They want on to say how even GPS/Navigation devices these days are effecting how we find locations and destinations. Kids aren’t using maps anymore, or can’t really read a map. Some schools are eliminating cursive writing as a graded course. They cite computer keyboarding and texting skills as the reason not to grade the course. It’s almost become obsolete. The list seems to be growing daily of the skills our kids aren’t developing due to technology.

Technology is cool. I love it, but we can’t lean on it. What if there is a severe and real black out someday. If we don’t have some type of social, communication, or survival skills, what will happen?

Things we need to ponder. Especially us old men.

Budget 2010

What a way to ring in the new year!

Liza and I sat down for our first ever REAL home finances discussion tonight. We came through unscathed. No scratches, busted lips or black eyes. It was a real eye opener though.

Money has always been something I've had a pretty good grip on. I've always been pretty good about spending less than comes in. But over the last couple years it's been tougher. We've had the 2 boys which means hospital and doctor bills initially. Then it means diapers, formula, diapers, formula, clothes, diapers, formula, clothes, toys, diapers.....

I've gone through different tests for my headaches over the last few years. Finally found medicene that takes them away quickly. That costs money. And last spring discovered that chiropractic care really reduces the severity and frequency of the headaches. That costs money too.

Add the reality of the cost of living today with all the unexpected costs and I quickly felt some financial pressure. And for the first time Liza and agreed we can't just do what we want when we want to anymore. At least right now.

I've talked to alot of people about Dave Ramsey and his way of becoming debt free. In short it calls for major budgeting, and basically you only spend what you budgeted for. Of course the aim is to pay off debt. I don't have the book yet or any of the DVD's. I have the general principle thanks to discussions with friends and family who are using it.

We're gonna do our best to fall in line with it. But man that's tough. The money is there, but the spur of the moment dining out stops will be a thing of the past. That's gonna be tough.

I realized a couple things though.

1. We were essentially living beyond our means. Not by much, but enough to where we were starting to see and feel it. In our own way we were keeping up with the Joneses. Two car payments, student loans, fairly decent cell phone and cable packages, eating out whenever we like, buying pretty much whatever we wanted. As much as it felt like freedom, we were starting to feel handcuffed.

2. You don't realize how much comes in and how much goes out until you really sit down and look at it.

3. I just don't know how other people do it. Living ain't cheap.

So after we looked at our "real" budget, I had to start thinking about what the future holds for the Hoods. We're budgeting based on today's salary, meanwhile not knowing what my employment situation may be in 3 weeks.

Now that's a fun exercise.

We occasionally had tough times growing up. Liza recalled some of hers, and I recalled some of mine. But we were alright. It grounded us and gave us an appreciation for what we do have.

It's tough for me in a way though. I have alot of pride. I'm proud of the career I have. I'm proud of the fact that I've never had to ask family for money. If I ever missed a payment, it was because I forgot to pay it. Up until this point, I've never really had to cut back on anything. I'd just watch my finances closer.

And here I am doing a real budget!!

But like I wrote recently, I ain't worried. It's hard to describe the serene and substantial peace we feel right now. We know God's hand is upon us. His word says He'll never leave us or forsake us. I told a friend who is concerned about my job situation that God and I are tight and He's got my back.

And as long as He's got my back, I'm in it to win it.

And who knows, I could even end up in a better spot.

Why should I worry?